A glance into the life of GP.

[Grandphoenix]

Pardon me, while I attention whore it up in good times, granted I know this would fit better in reality sinks in but I'd like to make sure many can see this. This is really a more blog style post but I just wanted to let those who know me know how things have been going to an extent however i'm just going to copy pasta most of it from myspace/facebook.

Spoiler:

Good morning to everyone, I hope you have the time to read this. I just wanted to have a little one sided conversation to let everyone know where I've been coming from for the past few months. I want to say sorry if I've been a douche bag or a complete asshole and I know a woman isn't any real excuse and I can't blame it all on her but she was the biggest contributing factor unfortunately to say. I'm not one to air out my drama to everyone, but I thought I'd share with you guys what I feel is the feeling of good bye. The one I loved for the longest of time moved in with another guy this week and this Saturday is was what would have been our 4 year anniversary. She seemed to have forgotten but I could never forget. I made some dumb decisions last weekend and I knew I was completely safe but have never felt so unready to die.

"Hey, I know you're just getting to work and you probably aren't feeling like being there, but I just wanted to say "Good morning". I'm sure the weekend was busy as hell for you but I hope you're happy with how everything goes and even if the end doesn't work out at least you know how it goes. I love you Kristin, and I'm actually am in a good mood for once it's weird to say but have a good day and don't look any other way..I don't know if that made any sense but it flowed lol..I won't forget what we had..10/17/05..Good Bye~"

I got dreams to accomplish and history to make, but I can't do it alone. I know everyone's busy with their own lives as I have been with mine but do me a favor sometime and try to drop by a line, I normally have a lot on my mind and would like to share it with you, if you have the time.

Thank you for those that have been near lately as you've been my biggest support and again I'm sorry if I've disappoint you but I knew what it took. Have a little faith in me now that I've come clean and take another look at me before you throw me the book.

P.s. The Game ♥

I've been busy taking 15 college hours and working with what ever free time I've had. I'm hoping to transfer into a nice school next year but have realistic fall back choices prepared also. For the past few weeks I've been dabbling into the drug DXM or as many recognize it as cough syrup; however, I wasn't using it recreationally by any means as I researched what it would do and and honestly used it as more of a spiritual tool if anything.

That combined with a philosophy class during the summer really opened my mind up on a lot of things. I've never been against drugs but I just never felt I had a reason to do them. I reached a point where psychedelics seemed appealing and harnessed it's power to achieve what I needed. I'm not sure if I'm done with it for good because perhaps when I'm at a different stage of life I will do it again. Yet now I'm content with what I have learned with my guide.

Aside from that just letting you guys know I'm still alive and I'm tempted to log on every now and then but damn credit card company gives me a hassle with that verified for mastercard shit. Hope things are well in Vana 'diel<3

 

[Sanoske]

Glad to hear youre alive and busy. How are my Gaiters doing?

 

[Grandphoenix]

Sitting collecting dust haven't logged on since end of May I believe?

I know some of my previous shells have reformed and some are doing okay and as any other shell still has bits of drama but hope you guys are accomplishing goals together in the end.

 

[Zoolander]

Yea college life definitely changes you. I love my current Philosophy class and just in general the classes you need for Gen. Ed. really teach you to open your eyes and learn about the rest of the world and deeper things (well if you take decent mixes of classes). And lol @ your thoughts on psychedelics...almost exactly what I went through. People who don't go through the experience just don't understand. Stay away from FFXI lol, sounds like you are moving on in your life towards something more fulfilling.

 

[Arthur]

Stay away from FFXI lol,

D= Don't do that! Nice to see everything is going good, was wondering about you.

 

[Mattaru]

Yea college life definitely changes you.

A) Simultaneously creates and destroys synapses in your brain.
B) Changes some, warps others - some people truly never change and you learn that when you and everyone else is supposed to "becoming" adults.
C) Changes happen every year and semester, trust me.

Some advice - all substance abuse is a phase, people who tell you otherwise do it because they haven't found something better yet to fill their time. Take that back, all substance abuse is a phase if said person wears it on their sleeve. I went to CU Boulder, so I've seen my fair share.

Women, yup.

Don't think your career starts after college, start getting experience now.

Good luck, and good morning.

 

[Serigala]

Yea college life definitely changes you.

For better or for worse, what you put in you get out, so if you make the best of it it changes you for the best. You can do a lot of good and fun things in college, as I'm just now realizing. Productive things.

Stay away from FFXI lol, sounds like you are moving on in your life towards something more fulfilling.

Probably the best advice anyone can give. I used to be one of those "yeah whatever" type of people when I'd hear something like this, but steering clear of addictions like ffxi is better for the body and mind, and you'll actually get something out of your college years and put more meaning into everything you do if you're doing it for you willingly. Personally, I've become a happier person since quitting

 

[Grandphoenix]

Aye I wont say I regret the near all of high school time I played ffxi. I met a bunch of interesting people that I hope will still be decent friends when randomly traveling across the world for work and what not once my career is started. However, that doesn't change the fact that I could have been a more productive teenager but the past is the past after all.

 

[Kaycie]

Hey GP as for the 3D retard system they make you use something in the POL system flags some cards, call your CC company if your still getting drama about it.
i would get all the way thru the verified screen to the final save then would get nothing but server is busy or my info was wrong messages on the last save.

Called the CC company they could see the string of 1 dollar holds from me trying to run the card took them about 10 mins on the phone but it runs fine now, however "IF" your card is not a 3D card call POL directly and they will manualy input it or at least thats what i was told when i tried calling POL before i called the CC company, if its a 3d card POl will tell you tough $h*t.

Good to hear your doing well i just started back to school fulltime myself my husband thinks its awsome he gets to make fun of me qqing about papers now =P