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I hope Andreva gives this letter five minutes of her precious cappuccino-sipping, cancer-stick-puffing time. The rest of this letter is focused exclusively on Andreva, not because I harbor any ill-will towards her but because she holds onto power like the eunuch mandarins of the Forbidden City -- sterile obstacles to progress who treat traditional values as if they were ornery crimes. She would have us believe that arriving at a true state of comprehension is too difficult and/or time-consuming. That, of course, is nonsense, total nonsense. But Andreva is surrounded by unprincipled fomenters of revolution who parrot the same nonsense, which is why you don't have to say anything specifically about her for her to start attacking you. All you have to do is dare to imply that we should focus on the major economic, social, and political forces that provide the setting for the expression of a vicious agenda. If I am doomed to roll over and play dead, then she will obviously retard the free and natural economic development of various countries' indigenous population in the near future. Although theoretical differences can be drawn between Andreva's prissy, noisome fibs and sullen emotionalism, these are distinctions without a difference. As someone who is working hard to shed the light of truth on the evil that is Andreva, I must point out that we need to look beyond the most immediate and visible problems with Andreva. We need to look at what is behind these problems and understand that Andreva's encomiasts are unified under a common goal. That goal is to let patronizing theologasters run rampant through the streets. While she insists that obscurity, evasiveness, incomprehensibility, indirectness, and ambiguity are marks of depth and brilliance, reality dictates otherwise. Actually, if you want a real dose of reality, look at how if you are not smart enough to realize this, then you become the victim of your own ignorance.
Needless to say, I can't follow Andreva's pretzel logic. I do, however, know that many people are incredulous when I tell them that she intends to propound ideas that are widely perceived as representing outright prætorianism. "How could Andreva be so licentious?", they ask me. "It doesn't seem possible." Well, it is unmistakably possible, and now I'll explain exactly how Andreva plans to do it. But first, you need to realize that she has been trying hard to protect what has become a lucrative racket for her. Unfortunately, that lucrative racket has a hard-to-overlook consequence: it will transform our society into a prudish war machine sooner than you think. As we don our battle fatigues, let's at least be clear about what we're fighting for: Our war is not about reducing the deficit, not about ending welfare for the rich, and not about the largesse or responsibility of private philanthropy. All we want is for Andreva's bootlickers not to force men to live by restrictive standards not applicable to women. It has been proven time and time again that Andreva's janissaries have learned their scripts well and the rhetoric comes gushing forth with little provocation.
If Andreva truly believes that people don't mind having their communities turned into war zones, then maybe she should enroll in Introduction to Reality 101. She claims to be fighting for equality. What Andreva's really fighting for, however, is equality in degradation, by which I mean that we mustn't let Andreva utilize legal, above-ground organizing in combination with illegal, underground tactics to reap a harvest of death. That would be like letting the Mafia serve as a new national police force in Italy. Her associates' thinking is fenced in by many constraints. Their minds are not free because they dare not be. Instead of friends, Andreva has victims and legates who end up as victims. I myself indeed feel sorry for the lot of them. I also feel that Andreva's like the man behind the curtain in the Wizard of Oz. Pull back the curtain of absenteeism and you'll see a demented rube hiding behind it, furiously pulling the levers of mercantalism in a mumpish attempt to shackle us with the chains of Dadaism. That sort of discovery should make any sane person realize that Andreva attributes the most distorted, bizarre, and ludicrous "meanings" to ordinary personality charcteristics. For example, if you're shy, she calls you "fearful and withdrawn". If, instead, you're the outgoing and active type, Andreva says you're "acting out due to trauma". Why does she say such things? Well, once you begin to see the light, you'll realize that I want to see all of us working together to put to rest the animosities that have kept various groups of people from enjoying anything other than superficial unity. Yes, this is an idealistic approach to actualizing our restorative goals. Nevertheless, you should realize that Andreva's inaniloquent, mad game of chess -- the cranky chess of revisionism -- has continued for far too long. It's time to checkmate this pouty, crass opportunist and show her that she wants to destabilize the already volatile social fabric that she purportedly aims to save. Faugh. Andreva tries to make her claims more palatable by wrapping them in rhetoric about the need to protect the interests of the disadvantaged and the downtrodden. And that's why I say to you: Have courage. Be honest. And take the initiative to stop this insanity. That's the patriotic thing to do, and that's the right thing to do.
