http://www.wtv-zone.com/LadyBoheme/dearsanta.html
Dear Santa,
I have been a good girl.
It really wasn't my fault what happened at Lisa's Christmas party. It was Chris who spiked the punch with too much everclear. I can't help it if I drank 8 glasses. It was so good---smelled and tasted just like clove.
I thought it was funny when I put Justin's underwear on my head and danced the Hokey Pokey on the end table while singing `Supermassive Black Hole'. I didn't mean to break Lisa's alarm clock and don't know why Lisa would sue me for indecent exposure.
I don't remember calling Matt's wife a fat chicken---even though she looked like one with purple eye shadow and green lipstick!
And when I threw up on Lori's husband's big toe, it was only because I ate too much of that pizza.
After all that fun, I admit I was a little tired. So I fell asleep on my way home and drove my truck through my neighbor's attic. I don't think that was any reason for my neighbor to call me a stinky armadillo and have me arrested for murder!
So, Santa...here I sit in my jail cell on Christmas Eve, all silly and stupid. And I'm really not to blame for any of this crappy stuff. Please bring me what I want the most---bail money!
Sincerely and easily yours,
Jen (Really a nice girl!)
P.S. It's only 72 bucks!
Dear Santa,
I have been a good girl.
It really wasn't my fault what happened at Lisa's Christmas party. It was Chris who spiked the punch with too much everclear. I can't help it if I drank 8 glasses. It was so good---smelled and tasted just like clove.
I thought it was funny when I put Justin's underwear on my head and danced the Hokey Pokey on the end table while singing `Supermassive Black Hole'. I didn't mean to break Lisa's alarm clock and don't know why Lisa would sue me for indecent exposure.
I don't remember calling Matt's wife a fat chicken---even though she looked like one with purple eye shadow and green lipstick!
And when I threw up on Lori's husband's big toe, it was only because I ate too much of that pizza.
After all that fun, I admit I was a little tired. So I fell asleep on my way home and drove my truck through my neighbor's attic. I don't think that was any reason for my neighbor to call me a stinky armadillo and have me arrested for murder!
So, Santa...here I sit in my jail cell on Christmas Eve, all silly and stupid. And I'm really not to blame for any of this crappy stuff. Please bring me what I want the most---bail money!
Sincerely and easily yours,
Jen (Really a nice girl!)
P.S. It's only 72 bucks!