Decisions, Deesizshyiones

Westyle

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HI I'M GEORGE ZIMMER, FOUNDER AND-no,no. This isn't that kind of post.

I've been thinking a lot lately because, well, when you live in the middle of nowhere there's nothing else to do besides think.

First off is me pretty much screwing myself over in life. I get the vibe some of you don't like me so you'll probably just eat up this delicious little bit of fuck up cake. I got this girl pregnant I met on the internet (no, this isn't the same girl from my previous virginity thread) which was a major point of stupidity as I am not attracted to this girl nor do I enjoy her company. I think its pretty shitty that all my friends are younger than me and are sexually active on weekly basis and haven't had anything like this happen while I've only had sex twice in my life; but balls on my face for not turning down a girl I'm not attracted to or atleast speaking up for a condom first. I've been pretty depressed about it since then. I haven't had legal discussions yet but I'm pretty sure it will end up with me paying child support. She lives in Raliegh which is about 4 hours from my current location and my future plans don't have me getting any closer and I'm not to keen on having to drive to Raliegh repeatedly for the next 18 years of my life.

Which brings me to the actual decisions:

I've been out of college for about a year, sitting in the middle of nowhere in my parents house, unemployed with an loldegree in graphic design. I was living with some friends from college, a married couple, but they had to move back home due to a change in plans, he was going to join the Navy.

So choice number 1: Join the Navy.

As I grew up I never really had any interest in the military, however my friend's dad was in the Navy and retired as a Master Chief so the military played a major part in his life. He too at first did not plan on joining the military but he has a graphic design degree like me and has bills to pay and a wife to take care of. He decided this would be best for its job security and benefits. He had recently began encouraging me to join and telling me about all the benefits to get. I want success and I want to get out of my parents' house. For having a degree I would start out as an E-3 (for those that don't know, that basicly means you automatically get promoted 2 ranks/paygrades ahead of everyone else just enlisting) I'm also kind of naturally smart, I graduated Cum Laude, and he believes I would do very well in A School.
Now I know a lot of you are in the military and are like FUCK YEAH but I'm a bit of a quiet and passive person. This brings me to my fear of boot camp. My physique can easily be described as so: 5 years of my life belonged to FFXI, the rest was shared between Wii, PS3, PS2, PS1, N64, SNES, and NES. I think I would be pretty much starting from the bottom in terms of physical fitness. The benefits do sound really nice though, plus I may be able to be stationed near two of the closest friends I've had.

Choice number 2: Norfolk Naval Shipyard

This choices comes from my dad and his brothers having very successful careers there and through his connections he may be able to secure me a position there. Since this is a government facility I'd pretty much be garaunteed a good career with good benefits. The problem though is that the postion he'd be able to get me in would involve physics and/or chemistry, two subjects I haven't done much in outside of high school. While they do train you, they mostly want people who graduated in subjects related to these and engineering. There is a graphic design-type branch at the shipyard that I may possibly be able to transfer to if I get in. Working here would get me out of my parents' house but I'm not sure how far I'd be able to live from this dead area as everywhere in NC that borders that part of VA is pretty dead and living in VA costs more, though I would be more familiar with my surroundings than in the Navy.

Choice number 3: Keep applying to random places

Blah blah blah moar self absorbed rambling blah blah blah


So here's a pretty tl;dr post from a guy you've probably forgotten about.

xoxo
 
#1 and #2 seem to be good to me, then again, I've considered the Navy before. Maybe some structure would be good, sometimes people telling you what to do can be good.

I'm sorry that happened to you though, bad boy for not using a condom and double bad for sticking it to someone you weren't even interested in. You've obviously thought of that though and shit happens, just sucks when it happens to you.

I hope it all works out, you're a good guy.
 
The smart way:

I'd tell her to get an abortion. I would have told her before the condomless sex that pregnancy = abortion.

I would also apply to every graphic design related job in the country and be willing to move anywhere I was needed.

Sure you leave family and friends behind, but you get to start your life over and change any part of it you don't like.


The other way:

Any of that stuff you mentioned.
 
At the risk of being controversial: did you ask this girl if she considered an abortion?

If she wants to keep it for some reason, I don't know which of your options is the best. Probably #3 because I don't like advising people to pick jobs they don't love doing. Remember you'll have to wake up every morning for work, for an indefinite period of time. It sounds a lot easier than it actually is, especially if you wind up hating your job. I've been there, and I'm sure a lot of other people here have too - it's not pleasant.

How proactive are you in terms of finding a use for your degree? Go out to places, talk to people, leave your Resume everywhere. In my experience, applying for shit online or via telephone is not productive. Employers like talking to potential employees in person - it's more personal and they get an opportunity to suss you out. If that fails, you could always grab whatever stable job you can find and work for a few months until a graphic design gig opens up. At least you'll have some money, and if your job truly is stable you can apply for a loan to cover the down payment for your own place or something.
 
I'm sorry to hear about your situation. Hindsight is 50/50 isn't it? There's not much that you can do if she chooses to keep the baby. Good luck with your decisions on what to do about it. It's not easy situation for anyone.

If it were me I would applying to jobs in the area but the military can be good as well. Being that your father was in the military you probably know more about that choice than I do. I work as a graphic designer and I know that it can be tough with such a saturated field. I have been lucky and have a steady graphic design job. Build up your portfolio, build and design a nice resume, and make some business cards. Even if your portfolio is full of stuff that you did for free for yourself, class, or someone else, put your best work in it. I would have a hard copy and a digital copy on a disk if you do web design. Just remember that even if you don't have a full time graphic design job, with graphic design you can pick up a lot of small freelance jobs on the side. Even if you have to settle for a job out of your field you can at least get your name out there by doing freelance whether it's just a logo or a brochure for someone. Every little bit can add to your portfolio and hopefully land you a better job.
 
I tried to talk her into an abortion but she refused and that was a long time ago, now she's already had the baby. Though she did tell me before that she was unable to have children.

The thing about applying in person to graphic design is that there really isn't anywhere to apply in person around here. I've been applying online and the only place to get back to me was a place that makes t-shirts in Charlotte but I had no way of moving there in the time they wanted me. The shipyard and the Navy do have graphic design positions but I don't know my chances of getting in to those.

Also it was my friend's dad that retired from the Navy, though my dad was in the army for a year because he got drafted to Vietnam.

I really do get tired of looking through job sites because no matter what search terms I use I have to sift through hundreds of results for air conditioner mechanics, registered nurses, and spam posts telling me I can make hundreds of dollars a day by filling out online surveys at home.

I'm really discouraged in graphic design as everyone wants someone that has 2 or so years of experience and knowledgeable in Flash and web design, 2 things I barely know about. Maybe I'm making excuses but I'm at a bit of a loss.
 
You'll find your way. Maybe one day you'll consider this a big blessing. You never truly know. Pay the child support, that's for sure, but go with what you feel is right at the moment.
 
Though she did tell me before that she was unable to have children.

Entrapment.

You don't want to screw over the child because it isn't his/her fault, but... you almost feel like saying "fuck off" to her. At least, I would.
 
Yup, the important thing now is the well being of the kid. While I encourage you to do what you can as far as getting into graphic design, keep in mind that with the Military you choose to reenlist every so many years. You can always choose to not make a full career out of it. In either case you should look to figure something out in the next few months. You can't just decide and walk into the military, they only have certain times a year they have boot.
 
ok well, was your name put on that childs' birth certificate? I believe that as long as you don't agree to pay child support and your name is not on the birth certificate, that you don't have to pay child support. However, state laws may vary on that :/

If I were you, I'd join the military.
 
My name isn't on it but I got a letter requiring me to legally respond so I requested a DNA test. I don't know how she found me though, she didn't have my number, my full name, or know where I live. I do very much feel like telling her to "fuck off" =/

I have been leaning a bit towards the Navy because of everything they do for you plus it looks very good on a future resume if I decide to leave. Also I'll get to meet people as I am a lonely person >_> I just need to work out a bit (read: a lot)

oi...

albundylg3.jpg
 
You can't just decide and walk into the military, they only have certain times a year they have boot.

Sure you can. Delayed Entry Program ensures you get to go to boot on the next go-round, and it's how my brother enlisted.

I have been leaning a bit towards the Navy because of everything they do for you plus it looks very good on a future resume if I decide to leave.

They're a great branch of service, and it does look very good to have any military experience/discipline on a résumé.
 
You went from that guy cracking jokes to a father over the years.

You're a big kid now!
 
You went from that guy cracking jokes to a father over the years.

You're a big kid now!

I wouldn't call myself a father, more so a guy with too many spermz
 
I tried to talk her into an abortion but she refused and that was a long time ago, now she's already had the baby. Though she did tell me before that she was unable to have children.

The thing about applying in person to graphic design is that there really isn't anywhere to apply in person around here. I've been applying online and the only place to get back to me was a place that makes t-shirts in Charlotte but I had no way of moving there in the time they wanted me. The shipyard and the Navy do have graphic design positions but I don't know my chances of getting in to those.

Also it was my friend's dad that retired from the Navy, though my dad was in the army for a year because he got drafted to Vietnam.

I really do get tired of looking through job sites because no matter what search terms I use I have to sift through hundreds of results for air conditioner mechanics, registered nurses, and spam posts telling me I can make hundreds of dollars a day by filling out online surveys at home.

I'm really discouraged in graphic design as everyone wants someone that has 2 or so years of experience and knowledgeable in Flash and web design, 2 things I barely know about. Maybe I'm making excuses but I'm at a bit of a loss.

Join the military and Enlist for 4 years. Save all your money, and at the end of it start applying for graphics design jobs everywhere. With the money you have saved, you can definitely move wherever you need to go. Good luck.. I'm really sorry that happened to you.
 
Yay a Westyle thread! It's been awhile since I've seen one of these. Too bad the last few have been so depressing...

Anyways, I'd say the Navy would be your best option. It'll suck dirty sweaty ball sack for a few years, but when you get out you'll pretty much be able to do anything you want. Getting a job will be a piece of cake. You'll have plenty of money in the bank. Shit you'll probably have enough to take a year off and do nothing if you want to(although I wouldn't recomend it, maybe just take like a month off. I'm sure you'll need it after getting out of the services).
 
This brings me to my fear of boot camp. My physique can easily be described as so: 5 years of my life belonged to FFXI, the rest was shared between Wii, PS3, PS2, PS1, N64, SNES, and NES. I think I would be pretty much starting from the bottom in terms of physical fitness. The benefits do sound really nice though, plus I may be able to be stationed near two of the closest friends I've had.

A friend of mine up and left his town to join the Navy out of the blue. He left a fat, lazy, worthless mommas boy and when he came back from boot-camp/basic, whatever, he was a dude you'd want on your side in a fight and had loads of confidence. The guy was brand new. Normally he'd not be caught dead doin' manual labor but when he came back we (some friends and I) were reapairin' friends and families houses from a tornado, he outworked us all ten-fold. He finally finished out his four years and re-enlisted, he loves it, every bit of it. He has been livin' in Japan for the past 6 years now so I rarely see him, but I hear from him often. Everytime I hear from him he always goes on about how be never thought he'd be where he is from where he was. He was always depressed and a bum pretty much, but now he's happy as a Lark.

After seein' him a few of my other friends took off and they've found the same kind of enjoyment. As well as a few of my sister's pals from where we live now. I could tell you a few more of these stories but it's just easier to say everyone who has chosen the path of the Navy has been pleased with their choice, very much so.

So with that said, don't fret over things that can change. It'll be a fuckin' ass-whip but most things in life worth havin' are. Personally, if it's an option you consider viable I'd hit it head on. I'd have joined the Navy years ago if I didn't have somethin' else goin' on or someone I needed to look after. Just keep a tight ass.
 
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A friend of mine up and left his town to join the Navy out of the blue. He left a fat, lazy, worthless mommas boy and when he came back from boot-camp/basic, whatever, he was a dude you'd want on your side in a fight and had loads of confidence. The guy was brand new.

That's very true, I have several friends from HS and college whom went / are going through that transformation. They'll shape you up for fatherhood buddy. Plus I rather pay taxes for that instead of a planned parenthood fixed income plan like so many trashy young mothers are abusing.
 
Nice advisingmentses and thanks for your collective concernedingment.

I've been watching videos and reading about boot camp am mostly worried about getting in shape and not having any relapses of clumsiness. I also have a tendency to talk like Boomhauer from King of the Hill. I just hope I don't stand out of the crowd too much like I usually do as I'm like a big white pole, getting singled out isn't something I'm too keen on.
 
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