Detox / Body Cleaning

Kelyon

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I have a drug test coming up and i was wondering what is the best way to clear out your body. I have been drinking lots of Green Tea and water but besides that i don't know what else. Excaliber if you are here i assume you know about this shit.
 
You can't really "clean" the body. If you've drank alcohol, for example, a doctor can see after 2 weeks that you've drank alcohol sometime during the past 2 weeks. When you smoke cigarettes, you can still see it on your normal breathing air after 8 min(even if your breath don't smell).

When's the test coming up? If its marijuana, I wouldn't be too worried as long as you don't smoke it 1 week prior (although tbh, I have no idea how long you can find traces of marijuana in your urine, but I'd guess 1 week is safe). If its heavier drugs, I'd recommend you don't take them at all, but I'd guess its 2 weeks for them.

There's a lot of false myths going around how you can trick tests, but all, if not most, don't really work. The only one that can work is urine tests, in which you replace your own pee with someone elses, but that one don't really work well if you're supervised.

Could always break your own leg and stay in the hospital during the test, and then do the test afterwards and check out clean >.O
 
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Pot it's the "Safest" bet to quit 2-3 weeks before a test as I have heard 30 days or so, pretty sure it's the easiest drug to get busted for on a standard urine test due to the fact it stores in your fat cells?

I have been on probation quite a few times where randoms occured but I have never tooken the risk (15 days guaranteed in county jail for a violation is not worth it to me) but most of my friends would just use the whizzinator when taking a test.

I would say a week straight of LOTS of water should clear out most of it.
 
As I understand when you use marijuana you aren't only high that day but you are considered "high"(as in mild effects) for the rest of the month at least and it's still in your system even if a little until the end of it.

If it's pot, I'd just wait a month or at least 3 weeks beforehand just in case, most drugs are usually out of the system by a month sans spinal tap of course...
 
The reason pot stays in your system for so long is that it sticks to your fat cells. I would just drink some cranberry juice to help flush the system. If you want to go to extremes eating a diet of apples and just water certainly detoxs the body.
 
JUST SAY NO to drug tests :p
 
Pot can stay in your system up to 1~2 months depnding on how frequently you smoke. I would suggesst alternating between lots of cranberry juice and water to flush your system out, if pot is what you're worried about. Other drugs leave your system within 3-5 days of doing them. So, they aren't something you need to really worry about.
 
Some extreme masturbation will clear your system. Trust me.
 
Vinegar does the trick, at least for pot. There's also detox teas sold at your local grocery store you could try.

It also depends on what kind of drug test it is. If it's regular old piss test, it shouldn't be too hard to pass unless you're retarded and got seriously baked a few days prior. If it's someplace like a hospital, lab, government, or military work, it's going to be much, much harder to fool them.
 
Some extreme masturbation will clear your system. Trust me.

One wonders, what constitutes extreme? Is it the method or the duration or a combination of both? *ponders* Please tell us Dr. Mancat.
 
Both. with a side of Bagels and or cream cheese.
 
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General drug tests, such as pee tests, are common. One thing you can do is go to your local smoke shop and buy some fake pee. The cost is around $50 here in San Francisco, but essentially you have pee that is fully clean (not actual pee either so don't worry about that lol). A chemist/ stoner came up with the idea for the apparatus that you strap around your waist or leg then go to the bathroom and fill 'er up.

Government jobs are waaaaaaay more difficult to pass. Some agencies will take a hair sample which documents which kind of drugs you have taken in your life (so I hear), but this type of test is usually reserved for top echelon agencies like CIA or FBI.

Back in the day I had an interview for Best Buy, got the job, then after the interview they said I needed to go get a pee test. I threw the clinic information away since I felt they had no business knowing what I do outside of work. I never did any drugs while at work so that was my reasoning. I can't say the same for others though lol.
 
That's disturbing in a way I'd never imagined. lol I shouldn't have asked. XD

I was going to say the rugburn afterwards but Myrrh just tops any feeble attempt of my win with omgowned.

Also....

50 bucks for fake piss to pass a test? Funny and sad at the same time lol
 
If they do a hair sample test, then you're fucked

Yeah, hair sample is the worst. They can pretty much pinpoint the exact day you did drugs by a simple strand of hair. Gotta hate science lol
 
Gotta hate science lol

Nah, I think it is a little funny. People should take responsibility for their actions -- good, bad, indifferent, drugs, or drugfree.

As far as hair tests go, I think it is up to two years for non-extreme hair lengths. 0.5" per month hair growth.
 
Pot can stay in your system up to 1~2 months depnding on how frequently you smoke. I would suggesst alternating between lots of cranberry juice and water to flush your system out, if pot is what you're worried about. Other drugs leave your system within 3-5 days of doing them. So, they aren't something you need to really worry about.

See the bolded above. If you're absolutely sure its a urine sample test, use a lot of natural dioretics (spelled that wrong I think) like asparagus, green peppers and as Iso said, cranberry juice and a shitton of water. You'll be pissing every hour or more, but your system will be flushed.
 
I hate skim reading, thought you said "dionetics" which then lead me to think what does L. Ron Hubbard have to do with pee tests?
 
Google the Wizinator,
 
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