Elder Stories?

[Uzor]

I'm sure we've all done some stupid/crazy things in our lives. But do you know anything your parents have done that's stupid and/or crazy?

Take my father for example. One time when he and his friend were playing, they accidentally put an entire farm field on fire. Another time while playing with gasoline, they set a mountain slope on fire. His friend once made a home-made bomb to put in their local food market's mailbox as a practical joke. However, he made it a bit too large, and blew a large hole in the wall. He have on one occasion drank dentist's alcohol (99%) and burned his throat and entire jaw from the strong alcohol. His sister became a drug addict and seller, making a small fortune from selling drugs behind my cousin's back, and have since stopped and now work with helping drug addicts out of their addiction.

My grandmother and her sister ran away to France to work as a burlesque. And they were not shy in showing pictures their half-naked selves (and more then that, even a few naked pictures). On the few occasions they came home, their mother put sleeping pills in their drinks to prevent them from running away.

My mother haven't told me many "wild and crazy" stories. Her stories consists mostly of her sexual experiences. This is naturally not something a son want to hear. Her friend apparently wasn't shy with showing his dick, though, and would occasionally whip it out at the hot dog stand while ordering a hot dog. Or randomly stroking it in the hair of his friends while they are talking. They did throw their chairs and tables out of their school room windows to protest. So I guess that could be the wildest thing she's done.

Do you have any stories to tell?

 

[Eilistrae]

when my dad was younger, he got angry with this kid, and hit him in the head with a hatchet.. lol

 

[K. Ishitar]

wrong button lol

When I can think of something that isn't overly personal or touchy I'll get back to ya

 

[Uzor]

when my dad was younger, he got angry with this kid, and hit him in the head with a hatchet.. lol

My friend have actually been in something similar, but yet quite different... Her father came home drunk one day and tried to murder them. He hit her mom with a hatchet in the head, so that her face above the eyes were hanging over the eye. He then stabbed her with a knife, and when attempting to escape through a window, he proceeded to stab her in the feet with a broken bottle that he earlier threw at her.

She eventually managed to escape, and the kids had ran over to the neighbors to call the police. They then changed name and address and moved away from there. However, in order to sell the house, she had to clean the blood up herself, with the help of her mother and daughters.

 

[Eilistrae]

oh I have another one about my dad!

when he was in the Coast Guard, stationed on Greenland, the guys stationed there had a pet husky. It was very hard for them to find sometimes because the native people would take the dog on occasion. In order for them to find the dog, they spray painted its fur red and green so they could find it from the air lol

 

[Zephayra]

My mom once told me about how she took acid in her hippie days and watched a sunset over a forest. She thought that the trees were bleeding. Cracks me up every time I think of it.

 

[Trippyhippy]

My mom... the craziest thing she ever did was beat the ever loving shit out of her sister-in-law. They had a verbal altercation and her sister-in-law just went outside and got in the car. Mom decided she was going to go appologize for calling her "stupid fucking bitch". Well she went out and leaned over to the car window to look her in the eye and say "I'm sorry". When she did that she caught a wad of spit to the face. So, of course the only thing to do after that was reach in the car and drag the woman out through the car window by her hair, then hit her in the face till it stopped being funny.

That is the craziest thing she ever did, aside from marry my Biological father.

Now as far as my biological father goes, he has spent a small fortune smoking crack. He is a contractor, and he makes as much in a week as I make in month. Yet, he lives in a single wide trailer and hardly has a pot to piss in, his kids refuse to even speak to him, and he has hepetitis C (liver disease from drug use), his brother and sister refuse to speak to him from past indescresions. After his mother died, she didn't leave him anything in her will, so he burnt her house down on my birthday. He'll be going to jail for the rest of his short ass miserable life soon. He's just fucking stupid.

 

[Excalibur]

My mom had her first kid (my older sister) when she was 16, with a 40 something year old guy. Then she lived with him for another 10 years until he died and had two more kids in the process (my two older brothers). My mom's mom was also sleeping with the guy at the time....the guy was also sleeping with a multitude of other women, at the same time that he slept with my mom....you know what fuck you guys, I hate telling this nasty story >< I don't wanna think of my mom like this you assholes

 

[Isollde]

My mom had her first kid (my older sister) when she was 16, with a 40 something year old guy. Then she lived with him for another 10 years until he died and had two more kids in the process (my two older brothers). My mom's mom was also sleeping with the guy at the time....the guy was also sleeping with a multitude of other women, at the same time that he slept with my mom....you know what fuck you guys, I hate telling this nasty story >< I don't wanna think of my mom like this you assholes

Then don't share it? :coco::coco:

 

[Genkaku]

My grandfather was living in a village outside of Dusseldorf in Germany when he was growing up. He ended up having an affair with, and knocking up the mayors wife. The mayor found out about it and went on a hunt to find and kill him.

My grandfathers mom was so distrought with the thought of him leaving home that she offered to buy him a motorcycle if he stayed. He declined.With a couple bucks in his pocket and only being able to speak German, he hopped a boat and headed to Canada.

Welcome to the beginning of my family's legacy. Now I know where I get it from lol.



My dad was back in germany when he was 14-15 and went off with his brother into the woods to mess around with a BB-Gun he got his hands on. They were arrested after someone spotted them and called the police. When they were hauled into court, my grandfather convinced the judge that in Canada, we all hunt for our own food in the woods. The charges were dropped and when they got in the car to drive home, My grandfather turned around and backhanded them both.



When my grandfather was in the German Navy they ported somewhere around India. AFter getting completely smashed they decided to buy a cow from a merchant in the market. 3 drunk sailors tugging and pushing a cow onto a carrier is no easy task, especially when it doesnt want to go. The cow fought so hard that it ended up having a heart attack and dying on the ramp. It was too heavy to move, so iirc they just left it there and hid inside.


lol this thread makes me remember all my familys old stories. Good post!

 

[Ruffyreborn]

My dad shot my older brother in the leg with an arrow

 

[Rayn]

My dad has some great stories that he told me, and which reminds me of where I get my evil side from.

My dad grew up with 9 brothers and sisters altogether and he was the third eldest. He grew up on a farm that had a lot of tall grass. Every once in awhile they would play Hide and Seek in the tall grass. Well when he was about 8yrs. old he was the Seeker, and everyone went to hide. My dad did not like the idea of running through the grass to find someone so he hatched an ingenious plan.

His plan was basically to chuck rocks into the field until someone ran out. My uncle (who is the next in line in terms of being the eldest) got hit in the head with one of the rocks. He ran out of the field screaming and crying with some blood running down his face. This was exactly what my dad wanted to do. When my uncle ran out my dad chased him back to the house and tagged him and exclaimed, "Now you're it!!" He got grounded and spanked for it lol.

Another Dad story I have is that one time my Dad pushed over my Uncle's highchair with him in it. My uncle was throwing food at my dad which pissed him off which then lead to my uncle getting owned in the end.

The two of them talk about those memories and laugh about it and how fucked up my dad was lol.

Go Dad!!