Adventures in Vana’diel
The story of Kittychaos & Elyssa
*All Names Other Than Those Of The Main Characters Have Been Changed.
**Kittychaos & Elyssa will heretofore be known as KC & Ely.
Jeuno Part 3
KC: I, Kittychaos Ferrin Mithrus, great-great granddaughter of the fifty-third Chieftainess of Kazham, 2nd cousin to the reigning one, Hero of all of Vana’diel, have found love!
Ely: Oh, goddess! Please tell me no.
KC: Yes! I have found him! My Prince Charming! My Knight in Shinning Armor! He is perfection and nearly matches my own beauty! Hair like fine silk. Eyes like the skies over La Theine Plateau. Perfect rosebud lips.
:Overly dramatic sigh:
Ely: Pale hair, blue eyes, and rosebud lips? He sounds like an elvaan!
KC: He is the most perfect elvaan there is!
Ely: Eww! Oh, goddess. I think I’m going to be sick! How can you claim to love one of those monkey boys?!?
KC: Pft! You only say that because you have never found love!
Ely: Sigh. And who is the Paragon of Manliness?
KC: I shall not say! Come! Let us meet him!
Ely: Meet him? What?!? You haven’t met him yet!
KC: It’s a mere formality. For once he gazes upon me, he WILL fall madly in love. Then we shall begin our lives together!
Ely: I told you to stop reading those stupid romance novels! They have destroyed your mind! And now you are even talking like them! ARG!
KC: There he is!
Ely: Oh, no. Please tell me it isn’t him.
KC: Oh, yes! Is he not everything I said he would be? Even his name has a royal sound! Ksoft.
Ely: :Groan:
KC: Oh, Ksoft!
Ksoft: Yes?
KC: Um…hu…
:Long and awkward silence:
Ely: Sigh. Hello, Mr. Ksoft.
Ksoft: (disdainfully) Do I know you?
Kazper: (snickering) Looks like two lovely mithra want to talk to you, buddy.
KC: He he he he he h—ouch!
Ely: No, you don’t. That’s why we are introducing ourselves. I’m Elyssa and my stuttering friend over here is Kittychaos.
Kazper: I’m Kazper and you already know my friend, Ksoft.
:More uncomfortable silence:
KC: Oomph. Stop hitting me!
Ely: Didn’t you have something to say to him?
KC: Oh, yes! Ksoft, I am – What I mean to say is, would you –
Ksoft: No.
KC: Huh?
Ksoft: What I mean is, No, I will not show you around. No, I will not give you gil or help you get some impossible to get equipment. No, I will not save you from certain death. And finally, no, I will not help you with any dumbass quest you’ve stupidly volunteered for.
Ely: Why you –
Ksoft: Good bye.
Kazper: Ouch! Someone woke up on the wrong side of the noble bed!
Ksoft: Kazper, be quiet. Wait until it happens to you.
Kazper: (snickering) Good thing it doesn’t.
Ksoft: If you’ll excuse me… ladies. I have more important things to do. Good day.
Kazper: (still snickering) Good luck you two.
Ely: Why that ass! He’s the –
KC: Isn’t he wonderful! So majestic! So heroic!
Ely: Is whatever world you live in, anywhere near this one? He just completely shot you down!
KC: He’s just playing hard to get! He just wants me to prove that I’m worthy of him. I’ll be back later and he will confess his feelings.
Ely: Sigh. You are completely unaware of what goes on around you, aren’t you?
KC: Do you think I should plan for a spring wedding? I’d make a lovely spring bride…
The story of Kittychaos & Elyssa
*All Names Other Than Those Of The Main Characters Have Been Changed.
**Kittychaos & Elyssa will heretofore be known as KC & Ely.
Jeuno Part 3
KC: I, Kittychaos Ferrin Mithrus, great-great granddaughter of the fifty-third Chieftainess of Kazham, 2nd cousin to the reigning one, Hero of all of Vana’diel, have found love!
Ely: Oh, goddess! Please tell me no.
KC: Yes! I have found him! My Prince Charming! My Knight in Shinning Armor! He is perfection and nearly matches my own beauty! Hair like fine silk. Eyes like the skies over La Theine Plateau. Perfect rosebud lips.
:Overly dramatic sigh:
Ely: Pale hair, blue eyes, and rosebud lips? He sounds like an elvaan!
KC: He is the most perfect elvaan there is!
Ely: Eww! Oh, goddess. I think I’m going to be sick! How can you claim to love one of those monkey boys?!?
KC: Pft! You only say that because you have never found love!
Ely: Sigh. And who is the Paragon of Manliness?
KC: I shall not say! Come! Let us meet him!
Ely: Meet him? What?!? You haven’t met him yet!
KC: It’s a mere formality. For once he gazes upon me, he WILL fall madly in love. Then we shall begin our lives together!
Ely: I told you to stop reading those stupid romance novels! They have destroyed your mind! And now you are even talking like them! ARG!
KC: There he is!
Ely: Oh, no. Please tell me it isn’t him.
KC: Oh, yes! Is he not everything I said he would be? Even his name has a royal sound! Ksoft.
Ely: :Groan:
KC: Oh, Ksoft!
Ksoft: Yes?
KC: Um…hu…
:Long and awkward silence:
Ely: Sigh. Hello, Mr. Ksoft.
Ksoft: (disdainfully) Do I know you?
Kazper: (snickering) Looks like two lovely mithra want to talk to you, buddy.
KC: He he he he he h—ouch!
Ely: No, you don’t. That’s why we are introducing ourselves. I’m Elyssa and my stuttering friend over here is Kittychaos.
Kazper: I’m Kazper and you already know my friend, Ksoft.
:More uncomfortable silence:
KC: Oomph. Stop hitting me!
Ely: Didn’t you have something to say to him?
KC: Oh, yes! Ksoft, I am – What I mean to say is, would you –
Ksoft: No.
KC: Huh?
Ksoft: What I mean is, No, I will not show you around. No, I will not give you gil or help you get some impossible to get equipment. No, I will not save you from certain death. And finally, no, I will not help you with any dumbass quest you’ve stupidly volunteered for.
Ely: Why you –
Ksoft: Good bye.
Kazper: Ouch! Someone woke up on the wrong side of the noble bed!
Ksoft: Kazper, be quiet. Wait until it happens to you.
Kazper: (snickering) Good thing it doesn’t.
Ksoft: If you’ll excuse me… ladies. I have more important things to do. Good day.
Kazper: (still snickering) Good luck you two.
Ely: Why that ass! He’s the –
KC: Isn’t he wonderful! So majestic! So heroic!
Ely: Is whatever world you live in, anywhere near this one? He just completely shot you down!
KC: He’s just playing hard to get! He just wants me to prove that I’m worthy of him. I’ll be back later and he will confess his feelings.
Ely: Sigh. You are completely unaware of what goes on around you, aren’t you?
KC: Do you think I should plan for a spring wedding? I’d make a lovely spring bride…
