for the next time you're in wal-mart

Nakoa

whaaaaaa
Adventurer
Joined
Sep 13, 2005
Messages
80
Location
96720
Nation Banner
Sandy
Linkshell
Made In China
FFXIV
Mini Nakoa
i found this on another one of the forums i browse :shock:

18 Things to do at Wal-Mart when your going to be in there for a long time:


1. Get 24 boxes of condoms and randomly put them in people's carts when they aren't looking.

2. Set all the alarm clocks in Housewares to go off at 5-minute intervals.

3. Make a trail of tomato juice on the floor leading to the rest rooms.

4. Walk up to an employee and tell him/her in an official tone, 'Code 3' in housewares.... and see what happens.

5. Go the Service Desk and ask to put a bag of M&M's on lay away.

6. Move a 'CAUTION - WET FLOOR' sign to a carpeted area.

7. Set up a tent in the camping department and tell other shoppers you'll invite them in if they'll bring pillows from the bedding department.

8. When a clerk asks if they can help you, begin to cry and ask 'Why can't you people just leave me alone?'

9. Look right into the security camera; use it as a mirror, and pick your nose.

10. While handling guns in the hunting department, ask the clerk if he knows where the anti- depressants are.

11. Dart around the store suspiciously loudly humming the "Mission Impossible" theme.

12. In the auto department, practice your "Madonna look" using
different size funnels.

13. Hide in a clothing rack and when people browse through, say "PICK ME!" "PICK ME!"

14. When an announcement comes over the loud speaker, assume the fetal position and scream "NO! NO! It's those voices again!!!!"

15. Go into a fitting room and shut the door and wait a while; and,
then, yell, very loudly, "There is no toilet paper in here!"

16. Take a snicker bar into a bathroom stall and wait until someone goes in the stall next to you. Then smash it inyour hand, reach under the divider and ask for toilet paper.

17. Hold a gum drop over a toilet, make loud grunting noises and then drop it in the bowl.

18. Prance around the store wearing a smiley face mask and hitting price signs, then wait to see if the prices go down.
 
If there is one thing I learned during my days in my 16th year of birth - it is to not f*** with Wal-mart. Wal-Mart > all /.\
 
LOL I have so seen this somewhere beforebut I can remember where. Still made me laugh.
 
11. Dart around the store suspiciously loudly humming the "Mission Impossible" theme.

It's sad, I've done this. Only, my friend and I stopped off at the toy department for our firearms :lol:
 
In high school me and my friends used to go to the nearby SuperCenter Wal-Mart really late at night when there weren't too many customers....COMPLETELY fill up a basket with random items from all over the store. Then push the basket to a remote part of the store and just leave it there.
 
Valandil said:
In high school me and my friends used to go to the nearby SuperCenter Wal-Mart really late at night when there weren't too many customers....COMPLETELY fill up a basket with random items from all over the store. Then push the basket to a remote part of the store and just leave it there.

When I worked at a Grocery store, I HATED you. It took hours to "unshop" all that stuff.
























It's funny now tho :lol:
 
god i worked at a walmart grocery store doing overnight stocking. I hated you people cause i'd get in to work and find 3 or 4 carts of shit that people left in asiles that i would have to do "go backs" for. Thank god i only had to do that for 2 weeks cause a new FNG started and then it was his job so he could learn the store better.

BTW

FNG = Fucking New Guy for all of you people who may have never heard the term
 
sorry triple post
 
sorry triple post
 
I had a couple fun nights at Wal-Mart in college.

They had a Ronald McDonald statue that was a target of many attacks and pictures. I use to go to the hunting department and put on the full faced hunting masks and camo suits and start lurking about. Random people would get the hunting comentator "Here we have a 10 point buck." or I would randomly flatten against the wall and tell people they couldn't see me. Wal-Marl can be a great place for the bored individual.
 
whats a code 3? fire? theft? gratuitous decimation of local economy?
 
walmart.jpg


Will someone think of the children?
 
Orchid said:
whats a code 3? fire? theft? gratuitous decimation of local economy?

I work at WalMart and I've never heard of code 3, but just cause I'm bored

Code Red: Fire
Code Blue: Bomb Threat (About once every year or after someone gets fired, lol)
Code Black: Weather (get these all the time)
Code Green: Riot
Code Brown: Hostage situation or shooting
Code White: Customer or employee accident (we get these sometimes)
Code Adam: Missing Child (we get these ALOT, such neglectful parents)

Falsey said:
walmart.jpg


Will someone think of the children?

People steal condoms and pregnancy tests ALL the time at my store, it's rediculous.
 
:lol:

Now thats pretty funny.
I'm kinda tempted to do some of those crazy things, lol. :-)
 
FYI at K-Mart "Caroline to the front of the store." is code for shoplifter and the guy employees are supposed to give chase. Or atleast that was the case in 1996.
 
for all you people that may think about shoplifting here's a little story of how i got 4 college students on a beer run arrested.

So i on break at about 4 am when i overhear 3 guys entering the store talking not too uncommon right.

Then i catch this sentence.

"I've never been to this store before." The other guy replies, "Well i've never shoplifted from this store before."

I watch them walk into the store

While they are in there i go to the back of their car and jot down their lisence plate number on the back of my hand. Then go back to taking my break.

Next thing i know the 3 guys come bursting through the breakaway doors and knockem off the hinges.

I watch this laughing to myself

each guy has a 30 (of bud light not my preference) under each arm and jumps into the "getaway car" and go flying into the parking lot

all the other employes come chaseing after and stop at the door since taht is policy not to follow shopplifters outside.

so we call the police i give my boss the liscence plate # and the story of y i have it

police come then go to the house registered on those plates and the dumbshits are sitting on the front porch drinking the beer that they stole

i got to spend the rest of the night getting paid to wait for the police to take my testomony and identify the suspects. I got 4.5 hrs overtime and a funny story.


Moral of story: Dont talk about shoplifting while your shoplifting and around employees
 
My friends and i used to go to walmart at like 2 in the morning and we'd buy the most random assortment of shit you could think of just to see the expression on the clerks face. the best one we got was when we bought the following.

a bright orange hunting vest
a box of condoms
a teething ring
a pair of leopard print thongs
a bottle of laxative
a bottle of "Doe in Heat" urine
3 road cones
2 rolls of duck tape
a bottle of glue
and a pack of old people diapers

the clerk had an OMGWTFBBQ look on her face, it was priceless. well...technically it was about 40 bucks
 
Don't worry Trippy, I've been on the reverse side of it too. I worked in a grocery store all throughout high school and also a couple of other retail chains in college, sucks when you're the one putting the stuff up, but it's fun when you're the one filling up the basket!
 
Back
Top