The life of an e-thug
for those of us that have been online any amount of time, or play multi player games via the internet, we've all seen e-thugs in action before
they are individuals that like to hide behind the comfort and safety of their online pen names
the same individuals who, in real life, are quite the people to stay out of trouble and to not provoke others
never would they allow anger to provoke them to act rashly or allow a fight to escalate
however, when they return home and don their aliases, everything changes...
hiding behind their computers in the safety of their home, they take on identities such as
xXsuPerAzNXx
Big WANG
sToRmR A I N
XXXGoldDRagonXXX
and
NeptuneXCL
with their new identities also comes a new vigor and a renewed sense of self
hiding behind the screens of their computers, they take pride and joy in wreaking havoc in the internet world where their true identites are safe from discovery
conversations such as:
normal person: "i don't think i agree with what you're saying"
xSUPERF0RCEx: "F*ck you man! you f*cking fag!"
normal person: "i'm sorry, i don't understand? i just don't see the logic in your point of view"
xSUPERF0RCEx: "n*gga you think you got somethin? you aint got nothing foo! ima f*ck you up!"
normal person: "i'm sorry i asked"
xSUPERF0RCEx: "what what you sh*thead, ill kill you mothaf*cka!"
sadly, the joy and sense of pride they derive fills only the empty void of their personal self worth
you can almost hear the squeals of joy at the end of each profanity filled sentence
the power is an addiction to these individuals, never before have they been able to say these words while insuring their personal safety, however, with their anonymity assured, they press on without fear
so how do we lay people strive to pursue the greatness these individuals have achieved?
how to be an e-thug:
step 1: make an alias that strikes fear into the heart of your victims, remember, the more X's and Z's there are, the more intimidating it is.
if you're asian, definitely be sure to put an AZN in, preferably with alternating capital and lower case letters
step 2: choose your victim and be sure to use and overuse profanity. it doesn't matter if it doesn't make sense, as long as there is profanity involved you are securing your e-dominance
step 3: if you are in an internet game, be sure to use leet speak. terms such as "n00b" and "nub" are preferred and underscore your leet skillz
step 4: maintain your anonymity. if asked for any information that may possibly identify you, skirt around the subject and continue using profanity. NEVER give away your identity or possible location, this will decrease your e-cock size and may put you in true, immediate danger
conclusion
video games don't cause violence.
the end.
