Love-Life Bitches, Gripes, and Complaints

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Removed by my own hand. I would appreciate it if the messages quoting my earlier post were similarly edited. No offense to anyone, but I have my reasons.
 
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Since I apparently managed to kill this thread with my last post, let's see if I can revive it with this one.

On the subject of games.

I'm not talking about computer games, or card games, or any other kind of actual game. I'm talking about the weird, twisty shit people do to each other in a relationship.

For example:

If, say, you and I were dating, and I ask you to give me an idea for your birthday present, and you reply "Oh, I don't want you to get me anything", here's what will happen:

I won't get you anything.

Now, if your birthday rolls around and you're dreadfully disappointed that I didn't go ahead and arrange something... Next time maybe you should just say what you mean. Say "I think you know me well enough to pick out something I'd like", or "Surprise me!" or something along those lines.

Don't expect me not to take you at your word.

In my experience (no offense ladies) this is typically way more of a female thing than a male thing. Most guys are relatively straightforward.
 
Love that example. Made me laugh and you are right. In the past, I was surprised my husband wasn't more psychic. After several disappointing special occassions, however, I learned. Now, I'm fairly explicit when he asks what I'd like or where I want to go etc. I look at it this way...at least he's asking.

One problem I see in a lot of my friends (including men) is the Hollywood movie expectation. Unless everything is totally romantic/sexy/exciting every minute, they cut and run for the next adventure. Too much drama for me.
 
Raesvelg said:
Since I apparently managed to kill this thread with my last post, let's see if I can revive it with this one.

On the subject of games.

I'm not talking about computer games, or card games, or any other kind of actual game. I'm talking about the weird, twisty shit people do to each other in a relationship.

For example:

If, say, you and I were dating, and I ask you to give me an idea for your birthday present, and you reply "Oh, I don't want you to get me anything", here's what will happen:

I won't get you anything.

Now, if your birthday rolls around and you're dreadfully disappointed that I didn't go ahead and arrange something... Next time maybe you should just say what you mean. Say "I think you know me well enough to pick out something I'd like", or "Surprise me!" or something along those lines.

Don't expect me not to take you at your word.

In my experience (no offense ladies) this is typically way more of a female thing than a male thing. Most guys are relatively straightforward.
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Pure win right here Raes, and yeah, not to sound sexist, but this is mainly a female thing. Why? I personally think it's because they (not all) want us guys to all of a sudden come up with some uber-romantic idea and suprise them with it. I agree with Raesvelg that if you want something, just come out and say it, if it's within our means, I'm sure we will do our best to get it for you! If you say you don't want anything, then shit, I won't get you anything LOL.
 
As a woman I rather my husband by me something he thinks I would like. Now at christmas I have my kids drop him the hiny since he gets that deer in the headlights look. lol Last time he did not believe them though. Now what gets me is when you ask someone "What would you like to do..." then they says "Idk, what do you want...."
 
Keryan said:
As a woman I rather my husband by me something he thinks I would like. Now at christmas I have my kids drop him the hiny since he gets that deer in the headlights look. lol Last time he did not believe them though. Now what gets me is when you ask someone "What would you like to do..." then they says "Idk, what do you want...."
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Ooooooohhhh that shit just makes my blood boil >_< If I ask you what you want to do, don't bounce the same question back at my ass! RAWR!
 
I agree that people shouldn't say "Oh I don't want you to get me anything," if they in fact would like a gift. That's a bit game-playish. I do however see nothing wrong with someone saying "I'd like you to surprise me." To me, at least, I prefer for a gift to be something thoughtful that someone knew I would love because they know me. To me the whole idea of a present is the surprise of it and that someone cared enough to make the effort. If someone asks me specifically I'll give them ideas, but yeah I like the unexpected.
 
Raes, when I have the time to really sit down, I have a response I'd like to give for yours. Short version: I really feel for you, man. /comfort.

Here's another question for you ladies... maybe you can help me figure this out.

I meet someone at an event, completely out of the blue, and we end up spending several hours together. We have a wonderful time, some of the most fun I've had in a long while. I get her phone number at the end, twice, even. I have every indication that she's interested.

So I call, it's the right number because it's her voice mail, but there's no answer and I leave a message. Then it's one... two days, and I don't hear back from her.

What the hell?
 
Could be any number of reasons. Maybe work is a bitch. Maybe something happened that took priority like a family emergency. Or maybe, straight cut, she just wasn't as interested as you perceived her to be. I don't know why some women can't just say "I'm sorry but I don't give my number out," rather than play that little game.

If she's interested, she'll call within a week. If not, I wouldn't expect her to at all.
 
That's what I figured, but seriously ladies, take note: Guys can handle rejection. It happens all the time, sometimes on a daily basis if you go out a lot. If you're not interested, SAY SO.
 
Please don't tell me you picked someone up at the anime convention....

One of my RL friends had the exact same experience you did at one. Trust me, no self-respecting girl picks up a guy at a convention, too many sketchy hookups going on.
 
Celvantes said:
Raes, when I have the time to really sit down, I have a response I'd like to give for yours. Short version: I really feel for you, man. /comfort.

Here's another question for you ladies... maybe you can help me figure this out.

I meet someone at an event, completely out of the blue, and we end up spending several hours together. We have a wonderful time, some of the most fun I've had in a long while. I get her phone number at the end, twice, even. I have every indication that she's interested.

So I call, it's the right number because it's her voice mail, but there's no answer and I leave a message. Then it's one... two days, and I don't hear back from her.

What the hell?
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I agree with what Zyn said (totally not surprising there ;) ), but I'd like to add a bit.

How long did you wait to call her from when she gave you her number? As much as I know women bitch about guys never calling, if a guy calls the same day or before the time he said he'd call, it can be seen as desperate, which is kind of a turn off. Women can be so dumb sometimes.

I know chicks who will give their number to any guy who asks for it because they're afraid to say no and hurt the guy. These are the same girls who bitch when the guy doesn't call when he says he's going to and say they'd rather he just tell them he's not interested instead of stringing them along. >_>
 
Got an e-mail yesterday as a matter of fact. /is now a happy camper.
 
<Removed post per Raes' request>
 
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Celvantes said:
Women *always* play games.
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That's really not true and not fair. Just like there are guys like you and Raes who are straight shooters, there are women who are as well. Don't lump us all in with the game-players because of past bad experiences. You guys are not the only ones who get shit on, I promise you.
 
Wow, the level of sexism in this thread is getting suffocating.
 
Alberic said:
Wow, the level of sexism in this thread is getting suffocating.
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LOL so whats new? For as long as there's assholes who play games with chicks, there will be bitches who will play games with dudes. It will never change, nor will that vicious cycle stop from perpetuating itself.
 
Removed by my own hand. I would appreciate it if the messages quoting my earlier posts were similarly edited. No offense to anyone, but I have my reasons.
 
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Removing my post, Raes. Might as well just close the thread.

Alby, Zyn, by 'always play games' I meant that it seems that way to us. What is a natural course of action to a woman will generally appear as a game to us. It's not intentional, rather it just highlights the very real difference in how men and women think.
 
Well a lot of women can say the same thing about men, so until you get a sex change and see it from the other side of the fence, what you're saying just comes off as completely sexist and ignorant.
 
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