My Real Life Rant About A Family Member

M

MayMaythaBiznitch

One Crazy Bitch
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Oct 10, 2005
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Galveston
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NoizyTribe
Well to get this started i just found out my grandmother has Luekemia I freak find out she is 10 mins away from me at the hospital. Due to me just having surgery last wed. and being restricted not to drive i said the hell with it and took off. I get there and i go up to her room and shes there but no one else is so im like ok they must be downstairs . So i asked her and she tells me that my aunt brought her and dropped her off and went home, so im like ok is she coming back NOPE so i get real upset because this is her sister that is supposed to be taking care of her so i figured she would have atleast stayed with her . So i told her well i have to take Joel (hubby zeldar) to work so ill be back tomorrow night and ill stay with you so i leave and all the way to my car im just a cussing i get home fall asleep . I call my mother this morning and tell her what happened and she gets ticked we chat for a lil while and i let her go to call and check on my grandmother shes doing fine hurting and all and just as i was about to let her go she said Hey Meg can you do me a favor and i was like sure anything what do you need and she like i need some under garments and i paused for like a min or two and shes like you still there and inside i was furious ! and i told her sure ill bring you some up tonight and let her go . I called my mom and every word coming outta my mouth was Fu*k that bitch shes coming to stay with me and i carried on for 5 mins or so then calmed down . So i tell my mom whats going on and she gets heated of course and im like regradless if she was getting stuck in the hospital or not she should have atleast brought a overnight bag for her , then my moms like oh i have something that will get you really mad and im like what is it ? She proceeds to tell me that My Aunt Becca called my Aunt Kina and told her she should really be ashamed of herself for not being there for my grandmother and my aunt is like you know i have talked to mom and she understands that i am out of state for my job and as soon as i get back i will be there and besides Meg is there with her and my aunt Becca is like well she was there for a couple of hours and left and probably not going back and im like WHOA whats that bitch's number i have some words for her and my moms like meg calm down and let me finish so she says that my aunt kina told becca that no thats not true meg is going to be staying with her tonight and maybe the rest of the time she is there in the hospital and my aunt becca is all i dont see why she never cared before so i get really pissed Because i call and check on her when i can and when joel isnt working i go and see her so anyways i let my mom go and call my aunt kina and tell her what she did about the over night bag and ask for her number because i had some words for aunt becca and she told me just wait for her to come down and tell her to her face so she wouldnt call my grammy and get her upset because she is the type to do that so i said well i'll let it go but when i see that bitch im gonna knock her the F**K out and my aunt just laughed and told me keep my head high . So now i come to the part where i ask for ya'lls opinions Should i have my grandmother come and stay with my husband and i since we are so close to the hospital so i can take care of her since it seems to be a burden on my aunt becca? if anyone has any opinions on this issue please post of what i should do i need someone elses opinion .

Thanks for reading this ,
~Maddambooboo~
 
When stuff like this happens it's difficult to not get emotional at first. In the end though things will have to be considered from a practical perspective, or the practical perspective has to at least be considered even if it isn't the deciding factor.

With that in mind, I would most definitely find out what exactly is going to be involved in having your grand mother stay at your place.

Caring for cancer patients can be extremely difficult across the board, emotionally, time wise, financially, etc. One of my family members died to esophagal cancer and another barely survived breast cancer. Having seen first hand what can (and often will) happen during this difficult time, it's not something I would recommend to others to just dive into.

This is not to say that the motives are not noble, or that you shouldn't help, but you should consider what the options are, and come to a joint decision made by everyone who will be involved.
 
Sculli said:
When stuff like this happens it's difficult to not get emotional at first. In the end though things will have to be considered from a practical perspective, or the practical perspective has to at least be considered even if it isn't the deciding factor.

With that in mind, I would most definitely find out what exactly is going to be involved in having your grand mother stay at your place.

Caring for cancer patients can be extremely difficult across the board, emotionally, time wise, financially, etc. One of my family members died to esophagal cancer and another barely survived breast cancer. Having seen first hand what can (and often will) happen during this difficult time, it's not something I would recommend to others to just dive into.

This is not to say that the motives are not noble, or that you shouldn't help, but you should consider what the options are, and come to a joint decision made by everyone who will be involved.
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I agree with that totally and i know i have the time for taking care of her , were trying to get her on medicare now and the S something where the state helps her out my husband provides for me the animals and his self we are stable but i do see the finanical being a lil hard , but im up for it . My mom and aunt kina both asked me to do this because they are both single mothers and work alot of hours and wouldnt have the time , of course they said they would help us out with whatever they could but mainly its the way my grammy's sister is acting they just dont want her with her anymore i mean they both said if they could do it they would but its hard for both of them right now and im 30 mins from the cancer center and 10 mins from the hospital that she is in but i dont know i really came here for feed back and need more but ty for answering Sculli .
 
I'm with Sculli here. It can be very demanding and with you recently having surgery, think can you really do what is needed? Its sweet of you to want to take care of her but if you have a job yourself, can you just take off for the day to take her to the hospital or rush home 'cause something happened or she needs something. If you don't have a job and you really want to help her out I say more power to you. Hate to be dying of cancer, old or young, and think I'm a burden to my family and noone will be there for me.
 
Has anyone asked your grandmother what her wishes are? You didn't say anything (or at least I didn't catch it if you did) about her being unable to communicate for any reason.

I think the best thing to do would be to talk with your grandmother about it first. She has been made a victim in all of this; letting her make a decision on the matter may help her feel more positive and confident.

Make sure she understands you will be there for her and love her no matter what. If she decides to stay where she is (as soon as you're recovered from your surgery) make frequent trips and visits. It is important for all family members to do this no matter where she stays so she has plenty of love and support and so that her primary care giver gets a break every once in awhile.
 
Sorry to bring this thread back up but thanks to the ones that posted , we ended up not caring for her she went to washington dc to a treatment center and sadly she passed away yesterday. For the first time in years i have never seen my family like this i have forgiven my aunt for the things that took place while my grandmother was in the hospital and i have been told several times thank you for being there with her , kind of hurts alot but i know shes in a better place now. Again thank you Sculli, Calv/Godofdeath and Linhjah your advice helped me alot.
 
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