Need some advice

Solan

Solan

A...M...B...
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Solan
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Ok so the whole thing started about a week ago. Me and my two friends Cody and Jessica were hanging out and when Jessica leaves me and Cody get on the subject of how we think her and her boyfriend might break up soon. Now she is a really attractive girl so if this would happen I know for a fact there would be a few guys who would ask her out like ASAP. Although I don't want to sound conceded at all but really the only people who have a chance with her would be me and my friend Cody considering we are all really good friends and such.

So a while after she left we were just talking and he brings up that he really likes her and that he wants to ask her out if her and her boyfriend break up. So I have no problem with this I also said that I would probably ask her out myself considering I really like her and all that. So after I said that I would probably ask her out myself he gets all Nazi on me and says that if I do that it'd be a total dick move. He is saying this because he has had a huge crush on her the last two years or something and that he really wants to go out with her. So my question is that am I a total dick if I do ask her out and she would say yes? I personally don't think that I am considering she's one of my best friends and I do really like her. When I bought up this to him he started in on the whole "That'd just be the biggest dick move blah blah blah."

So once again is this really a bad move on my part? Not like he has some like property over her if she breaks up with her boyfriend. Well all comments are welcomed. Thanks

-Solan
 
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Solan said:
Ok so the whole thing started about a week ago. Me and my two friends Cody and Jessica were hanging out and when Jessica leaves me and Cody get on the subject of how we think her and her boyfriend might break up soon. Now she is a really attractive girl so if this would happen I know for a fact there would be a few guys who would ask her out like ASAP. Although I don't want to sound conceded at all but really the only people who have a chance with her would be me and my friend Cody considering we are all really good friends and such.

So a while after she left we were just talking and he brings up that he really likes her and that he wants to ask her out if her and her boyfriend break up. So I have no problem with this I also said that I would probably ask her out myself considering I really like her and all that. So after I said that I would probably ask her out myself he gets all Nazi on me and says that if I do that it'd be a total dick move. He is saying this because he has had a huge crush on her the last two years or something and that he really wants to go out with her. So my question is that am I a total dick if I do ask her out and she would say yes? I personally don't think that I am considering she's one of my best friends and I do really like her. When I bought up this to him he started in on the whole "That'd just be the biggest dick move blah blah blah."

So once again is this really a bad move on my part? Not like he has some like property over her if she breaks up with her boyfriend. Well all comments are welcomed. Thanks

-Solan
Click to expand...

*cough*

You need to guide your bro's cock, not block it!

*cough*

But since he's got the first word, you lose, he wins. Next time, you gotta provoke your HNM faster. If it's yellow, it's free to claim man, but never mpk your bros! However, if he did claim it but somehow, it turned yellow and he can't regain it or for whatever reason, he died while claiming it, you can of course, go ahead and voke it.
 
You both are caught in the same situation, however, it really depends on her on who she wants to go out with. Don't think that just because your friend says all those things means that she's off limits and some other bullshit, because as you stated, she's still taken, and you guys aren't sure if they're gonna break up yet or not. If she's single again, maybe she wants some space? I would think that most girls, after the relationship ends, would want some time to themselves rather than rushing into another relationship.

To me, if you or your friend does go out with her, then he/you should be happy for them. there will always be other girls out there, even though they aren't a really good friend you can get to know them. Don't let one person ruin a good friendship, it's just not worth it.
 
If they break you think she's worth losing him over, do what you've gotta.

Maybe wanna give it time so you're not the rebound guy?

It it comes to you and your pal...

If he's not worth losing, you might want to ask him if he's willing to risk the same if you feel you can't be his friend if he does that...

Either way it's a little pickle.

Pick him, lose her.

Pick her, lose him and maybe not get her anyway.

Or you can just step back entirely, but what fun's there?

Draw your next card and see what kind of a hand you've to play man...

I'll be around however it goes.

Schmuck. <3
 
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I guess that depends.

Is a chance with Jessica worth losing the friend?

If it is, do it!

If it aint, don't do it!

Lotta hoes in the sea, really really good friends are hard to find.
 
Honestly though, if she's going to break up with her current boyfriend, she may not be in a mood to go out with anybody in the first place.
Some people need to keep that in mind >.>

Then there's the whole "I-said-it-first-I-should-get-dibs."
There is no guarantee that she'd go out with either one of you. There's only possibilities and to cut one person short on their chances...now THAT is a dick move.

If she's up for going out with someone, then the both of you should make your move. However, there should be no grudges between the two of you since you both have probably the chance to get to go out with her.
Ultimately, she's the one that chooses.
If she chooses your friend, then thats what was meant to happen.
If she chooses you, then thats what was meant to happen.
However, if your friend considers you going out with her a dick move, then that's not cool.

Your choice, your move. Your friend shouldn't have first dibs just because he's had a crush on her for oh-so-long. That is only relevant.
You can ask her out and your friend may be mad at you for a while.
Or you may not ask her out and your friend could get the "ok."
O~r...she may reject the both of you and you guys can talk about her anyways.

It may sound harsh but thats the way it is :/
 
Dating close friends is such a gray area.

There's the initial courting, which, if rejected, can tarnish your friendship. There's the dating, where the two of you slowly begin to alienate your other friends. And there's the breakup, where your close mutual friends become like children in a divorce, and have to be careful to spend time with both "parents."

In terms of your feelings on asking her out, I'd say just let it go. Your friend pulled a dick move by calling dibs on her before she was even single.

Chances are he'll ask her too early, she'll reject him, and their friendship will suffer for it. You don't want your friendship with him to suffer too.
 
Pasquale said:
Dating close friends is such a gray area.

There's the initial courting, which, if rejected, can tarnish your friendship. There's the dating, where the two of you slowly begin to alienate your other friends. And there's the breakup, where your close mutual friends become like children in a divorce, and have to be careful to spend time with both "parents."

In terms of your feelings on asking her out, I'd say just let it go. Your friend pulled a dick move by calling dibs on her before she was even single.

Chances are he'll ask her too early, she'll reject him, and their friendship will suffer for it. You don't want your friendship with him to suffer too.
Click to expand...

Yeah that is what I was thinking, is it worth the friendship getting fucked up if she says no or if we break up after dating. Yeah he mainly started saying that he had liked her the last 2 years and such after I said that I might not even ask her out considering it might mess up the friendship, so I guess he thought I was basically saying no. Guess his ego got a little to big there though.

Thanks for the advice about everything and to Masamura, fucking win :D
 
The girl may have already put you both in the "friend zone" anyway, and chitchat about "ooh my boyfriend and I might break up soon!" might just be her venting to you about her relationship.

Either way, you shouldn't threaten a friendship of yours over a chick that you basically want to date because she's a hot girl in proximity.
 
Dating friends ruins friendships unless your 100% sure you're going to marry them.


and you're not.


so no.


Don't.
 
Never, ever, ever try to jump off the Friend Ladder. You will crash and burn so hideously that you will be ridiculed among your friends for all eternity... or until you all get so old you forget.
 
So what I'm gathering is that dating friends isn't the right thang?

I was thinking this but at the same time not really liking the idea, but I guess it might just be for the best.
 
Solan said:
So what I'm gathering is that dating friends isn't the right thang?

I was thinking this but at the same time not really liking the idea, but I guess it might just be for the best.
Click to expand...

Only thing about dating friends is that unless you are both cool with going back to being friends if things don't work out, then you shouldn't do it.

Good thing about dating friends theoretically, is that you guys already know a good amount about each other and therefore you won't get major surprises sprung on you.
On the other hand, it will let you see more things about the person and not all would be necessarily be good.
 
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