need some help - NSFW (really... links and thread)

Claxton

Claxton

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I've been dating this girl (Anne) for a few months (we're both in college) and I'm fairly smitten. We're both virgins and we're pretty into each other and decided that we'd have sex soon. Fast forward and I'm at my place making out with her and one thing leads to another and we're naked on top of each other.

Soon however, a problem arises. I'm trying to have sex with her (I'm using a condom) and my dick just won't go in. Literally, she's really wet but the the point-of-entry is way too small and whenever I try to go in it feels like there's a wall there. This led to a rather hilariously unsatisfying encounter.

She's open to doing anything for me sexually and vice versa- we just don't know what to do about this. So I must ask, what positions/strategies make this first time physically possible?
 
Don't fall asleep in health class, kids. Embarrasing shit like this could have been avoided.



No offense, Clax.
 
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I'm going to apologize in advance.





















AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

Yeah, probably the hymen.

(That is all. Carry on.)
 
this was a copy paste job I'm just bored while the eve servers are down
 
oh god i remember having that moment its oh so fun :D lol If its not that she might just be stressed out about it still and just a bit to tight?
 
lol Yeah, that would probably be the hymen. Push threw and don't look back. A little blood never hurt anyone. In fact, blood has been known to keep the living ... well ... living. :D Just hope her parents didn't put a guillotine in there.

Oh, and Nego mentioned what face to make, but you also need a one-liner to say before you do it. My last devirginization of a girl necessitated the use of the line "For Sparta"
 
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Claxton, you sir just made my day. This is easily the funniest thread in months. I don't know what's more hilarious, the fact that you made it all the way to college without knowing what a hymen is, or that she did. Did she like...never stick her finger in there or anything??
 
Excalibur said:
Claxton, you sir just made my day. This is easily the funniest thread in months. I don't know what's more hilarious, the fact that you made it all the way to college without knowing what a hymen is, or that she did. Did she like...never stick her finger in there or anything??
Click to expand...

That's actually very true. A lot of girls actually break their hymen themselves either diddling or with a tampon (weird, but I know a girl who has lol)
 
Lanien said:
That's actually very true. A lot of girls actually break their hymen themselves either diddling or with a tampon (weird, but I know a girl who has lol)
Click to expand...

Also why girls love horses...I've heard of hymens breaking from the up and down bouncing on a horse ride. I don't know how true that is though, seems kinda unlikely now that I think about it...but I'm no hymen expert (in spite of what I tell all my friends... HAHAHAHA!21! I'm so fucking funny)

Grem said:
Copy pasta folks.
Click to expand...

I'm choosing not to believe that. It's way funnier if it's Clax.
 
Just take off the condom and 'feel around' without it, that will help alot, break the hymen, stick it in, strech her out a bit, then put the condom on and go to town. Her shit is most likely really tight and it will be a pain to get it in the first few times, just have her help you...

Just dont get frustrated, it kills the mood.

edit: Dont do you on top first time, pull her to the edge of the bed with you standing on the ground. It helps me get in easier, plus you can look down and see what your trying to do. If your too afraid to look down at her pussy then you shouldnt be having sex, just an afterthought.
 
Excalibur said:
Claxton, you sir just made my day. This is easily the funniest thread in months. I don't know what's more hilarious, the fact that you made it all the way to college without knowing what a hymen is, or that she did. Did she like...never stick her finger in there or anything??
Click to expand...
I found it on another website and thought it was funny

edit: did no one read my second comment?
 
reminds of when a co-worker of mine was pregnant for a week by her boyfriend. She had told me she had defective ovaries and that most likely it will be a miscarriage, well one early morning she was rushed through the hospital by her boyfriend(she had her miscarriage, but didn't know she didn't know it at the time) because of some pain.

The doctor did a test and told her she had a miscarriage, she started to cry a little....

Her boyfriend: Uh...what's a miscarriage?

The doctor stared at him, his gf was embarrassed and just looked at him...

they're both 22 btw >_> been together for about 2 years...

When she told me that I laughed pretty hard.

somewhat irrelevant but I thought i'd share=P
 
Lanien said:
lol Yeah, that would probably be the hymen. Push threw and don't look back. A little blood never hurt anyone. In fact, blood has been known to keep the living ... well ... living. :D Just hope her parents didn't put a guillotine in there.

Oh, and Nego mentioned what face to make, but you also need a one-liner to say before you do it. My last devirginization of a girl necessitated the use of the line "For Sparta"
Click to expand...


I prefer the get her close to climax pull out and look her deep in the eyes and just saying "Bob Dole"...
 
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