Kypdurrondragoon said:
One thing I have to say to Wink's post, what if say yer 16, live at home, like you should, and yer parent says, "It's time to get off," so you say, "But mom/dad, can I at least stay until I level?" And they say yes, but not a second longer? The fact that you say if someone says they have/need to go when they lvl does not mean they don't want to exp, it could very well mean that they have to go because of uncontrollable RL forces. It's not necessarily bullshit to have this happen. I mean, c'mon now, it happens. I've had it happen to me, where my dad makes me get off, but I get him to let me stay that long.
I've said this a number of times, and some people may find it harsh, but it's genuinely how I feel: if there's any question whatsoever that you have anything less than two full hours to devote to a party that you're starting up with, or perhaps a bit less to one you're joining, you should seriously be considering whether or not that's the best time for you to be trying to look for a group.
Party-play is time-intensive, and it is not for those that may have to up and go at a moment's notice. People with ambiguous schedules like that get huffy when I say this, but it's true. Solid blocks of free time really are something that you've got to have to play most MMORPGs; at least, it's something you should have in order to justify inflicting yourself on a party within the game.
If you've only got two hours before you've got to go to work, and you know it'll take one hour alone to find and start up a party, DON'T put your flag up, and certainly don't even DREAM of trying to start a party. Joining a party with an hour to go is bad, but starting one under such circumstances is much worse. If you have limitted time to play, then fine: craft, solo on some job that can handle it, whatever you want ... a party is going to have to wait, however, until you know you've got a good block of a few hours to invest. The infamous 45-minute disband is simply one of the most obnoxious things one can do.
So, no ... your parents forcing you off the computer isn't really a valid reason. You very much knew that you didn't have a whole lot of time to devote in the first place. It's a bit more understandable than simply deciding you want to pop in the sixth season of
The Simpsons on DVD, but it's still not exactly kosher. Situations that call for ambulances or police: THOSE are valid reasons for the random disband.
I may be asking for too much here, based simply on what I myself do, but it's the truth: I don't dream of looking for a party unless I know I've got the time for it. How badly I want to level generally comes in second place as a consideration. I really wish more people would think this way. T_T
Georgebobbilly said:
Not always true <.< I sometimes force a D/C to get out of a party.... only when it's an absolute waste of my time though.
This is another thing that I take a lot of issue with: the intentional disconnection. The simple truth is, you're not fooling anyone. Real, valid disconnections in which you literally cannot log back in for a full hour or more are very rare. I know that they do happen, but not enough to justify how rampant a thing exitting a party via disconnect is.
The sad truth is, if you lag out and never return, there's always going to be a strong suspicion that you did so on purpose, whether you did or not. Why? It's because if you really do never return, it probably WAS on purpose, and everyone knows it.
What's more, nobody appreciates the not-so-subtle attempt at deception. I promise you, people will give a lot more respect to someone with the balls to give a straightforward "I don't want to party anymore, I'm sorry," or a "This isn't really working out, guys, I think I'm going to go." If you don't want to stay, don't try to avoid drama by sneaking out with an unplugged modem. Just do your best to be polite, and explain that you're making an exit. The random disband is bad, and not exactly honorable, but the deceptive disconnection is far worse.
To those of you who say that your experience with Japanese players indicates that they're more willing to up-and-go with little to no notice, well ... I think one or two factors are coming into play, namely:
1) The language barrier; they're not quite sure how to get across they need to go ahead of time. "{Time for work!} {Short Time} 30min" doesn't make nearly as much sense to a Japanese player as you think it does.
2) You're dealing with the 'outcasts' from the larger Japanese player base, the dregs, that are really willing to deal with primarily NA parties at large. There are very rude, horrible Japanese players, it's true, but the Japanese player base tends to have a loooong memory, and they remember names very well. The truly bad, newbie ones generally end up "exiled" to ... well, us. I'm not kidding, here.
Also, the more "NA-minded" Japanese players, that like the idea of being able to leave whenever they want, and have come under the impression through repeated experience that NA parties are absolutely fine with it, may lean more heavily to finding NA partners.
Yes, I feel that the Japanese player base has issues with xenophobia, and there's some cultural adaptations I wish they'd make, too. On this particular issue, however, their community is far, far more mindful of seeing a party through to the end, and not "ditching." It's very important to them. I speak from experience, and I'm sure anyone else with some minimal Japanese language skills that has played with a few all-Japanese parties can back me up on this. The mid-party exit is something they see us as doing too often, not the other way around, and it's part of the bigotry towards us.
There was a thread that popped up a few weeks back, that originally came from Allakhazam:
http://www.qcdn.org/showthread.php?t=24250
It talks about this kind of difference between the two communities in greater detail.
