Wimpy Leaders >_>

Pompidou said:
Urat, you were a friend of mine in game, so please, take my advice. Don't say anything.

That's the advice. Don't say anything.

You're not a bad guy. You're enthusiastic. You seem to mean well, despite how things turn out in practice. But, you talk inappropriately. I don't want you to become the next QCDN pariah. You might think it's too late, but it isn't. You can save your entire FFXI reputation. It's not too late. All you have to do is shut up. I mean that in a nice way. You're in quicksand, and you need not die. I'm tossing you a rope called shut up. Seriously.

If you let this drop, if you keep yourself out of trouble, people will forget. Don't make exaggerate. Don't post ideas for things you can't do yet. Don't talk. You have friends. You have a linkshell. You have tells. Stick to that for quite a while. I'm watching you destroy yourself and it isn't fun.

You seem to have a great need to prove yourself. I can understand. You were a mid level character in a social shell of 75s. You don't have to prove anything. Don't act big. You don't need to act big. You want to be popular? You can be. Try modesty. Seriously. Some people in FFXI are assholes. The won't be worthwhile no matter what they do. You're not. However, your FFXI social skills need a lot of work. Don't you see what you're making people think of you?

Lay low. If you think you don't need to lay low any longer, lay low another month after that. If you absolutely must post, keep it non XI. Keep it modest. You can be likable. Be likable. Nobody cares about accomplishments when they decide who to be friends with. I had lots of friends and no accomplishments. Just be modest. QCDN will appreciate you for it. FFXI will appreciate you for it. Don't try and stick yourself in the top tier. You won't be till you hit 75 and merit to no end and do endgame stuff. If you try, people will resent you for it. You don't want to be, and don't deserve to be, resented. So for god's sake, stick to your strong suits and stop the know it all business.

Let your name fall off the FFXI radar. Come back with a second chance and you'll be just fine. You're no where near as great as you give the impression you are in your dialogues here and in game. You're no where near as bad as the people here think you are because of your actions. So anyway. Save yourself, because if you become the next FFXI outcast, you'll probably end up quitting. How much fun would that be? If you think there's glory in being the single persecuted victim, there isn't. I hope you take my advice and drop into the shadows till the smoke clears.
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This is the best advice for Urat. Try to follow it and people will forget eventually. :S
 
Just like from an awesome movie I saw recently, dont wanna say for those who havent seen... But "people have a short memory for the good things you do, but a very long memory for the bad things you do"
 
Falsey said:
Just like from an awesome movie I saw recently, dont wanna say for those who havent seen... But "people have a short memory for the good things you do, but a very long memory for the bad things you do"
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thats why it is easier to have bad reputation than good reputation. people remember how much ass are you, not how nice are you.
 
Spalko said:
thats why it is easier to have bad reputation than good reputation. people remember how much ass are you, not how nice are you.
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I respectfully disagree. Sure, plenty of people remember the idiotic things others do for a long time, but lasting impressions are built over time also.

It's just as easy to be remembered or thought of as a douchetard as it is to be known as a shining example of awesome (e.g. like Tristam Green).
 
Pompidu is a true friend with excellent advice. I'd kinda like the self-deprecating Urat who's eager to learn.
 
Tristam Green said:
I respectfully disagree. Sure, plenty of people remember the idiotic things others do for a long time, but lasting impressions are built over time also.

It's just as easy to be remembered or thought of as a douchetard as it is to be known as a shining example of awesome (e.g. like Tristam Green).
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Who are you again?

j/k {word} {up}
 
Miros said:
This is the best advice for Urat. Try to follow it and people will forget eventually. :S
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Lol after his last diatribe I'm sure this will take some time to heal over since he really displayed a greater amount of stupidity in that thread than this one.

This thread and the other that I'm specifying, the one where he grossly misused the terms newfag and oldfag, are the reasons why he's on my ignore. :awesome:
 
Silenus said:
Pompidu is a true friend with excellent advice. I'd kinda like the self-deprecating Urat who's eager to learn.
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...I'll honestly take this to heart.

I suppose I'll shut my mouth for awhile, and after awhile I may be able to get my foot out of it if I'm lucky.

I've been trying in game to take a more learning attitude in my dynamis ls and social lses, along with pick up runs in nyzul and etc.

Really learning a lot just by following orders and trusting the people with floor 100 locked know what they're doing etc.
 
Urat said:
...I'll honestly take this to heart.

I suppose I'll shut my mouth for awhile, and after awhile I may be able to get my foot out of it if I'm lucky.

I've been trying in game to take a more learning attitude in my dynamis ls and social lses, along with pick up runs in nyzul and etc.

Really learning a lot just by following orders and trusting the people with floor 100 locked know what they're doing etc.
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While we're on the subject, I've noticed you've all but abandoned being yourself. Your posts typically summarize whatever the bandwagon is. This isn't necessary. You CAN be yourself in FFXI. You can be yourself on QCDN. If you post from experience, you can post your honest opinions. Be yourself. You'll be a lot happier that way. I saw one instance where you took to flaming Pchan, someone whom you have no problems with, seemingly to gain public approval, and I've seen many times where your position changes through the course of a thread as you try to figure out what the public opinion is to mirror it. You'll never be happy this way. Remember the days when you were in the linkshell with me and you would singlemindedly but respectfully argue your chocobo raising theories against the whole LS? That was admirable. Be admirable. If you only post of what you know first hand, you can post anything. Don't be a blind follower. You're not an idiot. When you come back from your vacation from the boards, come back as Urat, not as a copy paste synopsis of the five most popular members of any thread. You have your own voice. People can see through efforts to fit in at all costs. Be modest, but be yourself. If you need to vent I'm all ears.
 
More ideas:

If you always want a well done, valid post on FFXI matters, try this. Make sure in any given post you can say two things.

1: This is what I did.
2: This is what happened.

If you post that, you'll never be wrong. Don't even qualify your statements in terms of how effective they are. Saying "This is the best way to do it" is always debatable. Your direct experiences aren't. I did X, and Y happened. You'll ALWAYS be speaking the truth. NOBODY can call BS on you. If someone disagrees, they can say, I did this, and this happened. You can see that the other person is better or worse than you. If you're better, no need to say so. People can read. If you're worse, no need to say so. Heck, you'd get tons of brownie points for acknowledging a better process and trying it yourself. FFXI'ers LOVE it when people learn and improve.

Post what YOU did. Post the results. You can do no wrong.

Now, that would limit you to topics that you have first hand knowledge of. It would stop people at places like BG from getting pissed at you for posting out of your league. If you have to post outside of first hand experiences, that's ok too in moderation. Just phrase your response with your source cited. "Source X says Y, and they say Z happens. I haven't tried it myself, but it seems credible. Just thought I'd throw it out there, since noone else has." That's appreciated in the right context. It's when you come across like you have 1st hand experience in areas you don't that causes a lot of the public ire.

You'll end up alright after all of this. Just a couple small adjustments here and there and you'll be all set.
 
Pomp basically gave you the basics on Reasonable Discussion: 101. I can attest for Urat being a very nice fellow, but generally take everything he says with a grain of salt. If someone's being a jackass, I'll be one of the first to call them on it, but I'd like to see people give him a break, even if it just be a civil discussion as to why his thoughts are incorrect, as opposed to "OMG you're a dumbass!!lol!"

And to Urat, listen to the advice you've been given. Reputation is a hard thing to manage if you're really that worried about it, but it can be easily salvaged in your situation. Sure, ninja lotting a RDM hat in Dynamis or being caught on the FFXIapp list can ruin you on this server, but nothing you've done warrants that harsh of a punishment. Just lay low, and maybe read your posts an extra time or two before you click that "Submit Reply" button. You'll find that many people will eventually change their opinions of you. Not only on this board (Because I'm a total dick on this board, and for some reason people still like me :O ) but wherever else you post, just take it down two notches.
 
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