Zombies!

Uzor

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It's on!

http://www.nola.com/news/?/base/news-1/1239081731120020.xml&coll=1 said:
Stranger takes bite of gardener's arm

Victim says attacker chewed, swallowed
Tuesday, April 07, 2009 By Michelle Hunter
East Jefferson bureau

A Metairie resident is recovering after a stranger bit a chunk of flesh out of his arm, and swallowed it, Saturday afternoon.
Joseph Lancellotti, 67, told authorities he did not know the suspect, later identified as Mario Vargas, 48, or why he was attacked in his front yard.
Lancellotti was gardening at his home in the 4400 block of Kawanee Avenue about 2 p.m. when he noticed a man walking toward his house, shouting angrily, the report said. Lancellotti said he couldn't understand the man because he was yelling in Spanish. But when the man got within two feet, he slugged Lancellotti in the head, the report said.
Lancellotti said he tried to defend himself with a garden rake. As the men struggled over the rake, the stranger bent over and bit Lancellotti on his right forearm, the report said. Lancellotti's flesh ripped away as he fell to the ground. The man then got on top of Lancellotti and began choking him, the report said.
It was then that neighbor Chantal Lorio, a podiatrist and director of the Wound Center at East Jefferson General Hospital, came out to check on Lancellotti. Lorio said Monday that she first thought Lancellotti was having a heart attack and the other man was trying to help him.
The stranger was still gripping Lancellotti as Lorio noticed her neighbor was lying in a pool of blood. She didn't learn what happened until she began dressing the wound -- with the stranger still clutching her neighbor's shirt.
"He said, 'He bit my arm, chewed the flesh and swallowed it in front of me,' " Lorio recalled. She said the bite measured almost 3 by 1 1/2 inches, and was less than 1/4-inch deep.
The pair tried to calm the stranger, who never made any attempt to run away. He eventually let go of Lancellotti and walked two blocks to a parking lot, where he hovered near an empty police car, the report said. The suspect was still standing there when deputies arrived and took him into custody.
Vargas, of 724 Camp St., New Orleans, was booked with second-degree battery. He was being held Monday at the Jefferson Parish Correctional Center in Gretna in lieu of $25,000 bail.
Lancellotti's wife, Bonnie, 60, said Monday that her husband was recovering from the bite, physically and mentally. She said his sense of safety in his neighborhood has been shaken.
With all the bacteria involved, Lorio said a bite from a human is worse than an animal bite.
Bonnie Lancellotti also has concerns about the suspect, who apparently had been treated at East Jefferson General Hospital earlier in the day for a finger injury. Vargas was released 45 minutes before the attack, according to the incident report.
Bonnie Lancellotti wondered whether hospital staff noticed anything amiss while treating Vargas. "This person's clearly lost his sense," she said. "I mean, what else can you say, eating people's skin?"
Keith Darcey, spokesman for the hospital, said, "We cannot comment on any individual patient because of privacy laws. But as a matter of general hospital policy, the emergency department has behavioral health nurses available to help diagnose patients who might require mental health assistance."

What's your choice of weapon?
 
Baseball bat, crowbar. Why are we limited to just one?

Anyone else have that crazy plan for the remote IF zombies rise? We always joked about it, but I sometimes catch myself going over it and looking for holes.

You know. Just in case.
 
Knife. Big fucking Knife.

Auger.



But in all seriousness(As serious as a Zombie uprising is,) I'd probably use a hedge trimmer. Chainsaws always struck me as massive overkill considering decomposing flesh and all. So I'd go with the lighter, more compact, but equally effective version. You don't have to cut through bone if you just split them at the joint. I figure severed muscles would still disable a zombie.

Anyone else have that crazy plan for the remote IF zombies rise? We always joked about it, but I sometimes catch myself going over it and looking for holes.

The best plan would be to get to a farming community. Besides cities being absolute death traps because of population density, the wide open range allows you to spot some coming. Always include a someone who is, or has been a Gas Station clerk in your survival party as well. It's not rocket science, but having someone who knows how to get pumps working instantly is better than having to wait around while you fumble with the register. Board windows up from the outside. Zombies pound, they don't pull. That said, rehinge doors to swing outwards, or if theres a storm door, make sure it's boarded up from the outside as well.
 
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Mother fucker seeing as im in the Military ill be one of the first to die in the defense, GOD DAMN IT!! :(
 
Everyone should go get The Zombie Survival Guide

If you ever find yourself in an undead world, follow these steps and you are sure to survive.

1. Organize before they rise!
2. They feel no fear, why should you?
3. Use your head: cut off theirs.
4. Blades don’t need reloading
5. Ideal protection = tight clothes, short hair.
6. Get up the staircase, then destroy it.
7. Get out of the car, get onto the bike.
8. Keep moving, keep low, keep quiet, keep alert!
9. No place is safe, only safer.
10. The zombie may be gone, but the threat lives on.


Machete a shotgun with a flashlight attachment and some extra ammo....
 
7. Get out of the car, get onto the bike.

Zombie Survival Guide is retarded for this one thing. You tire out on a Bike, and don't cover much ground. Cars can go for hours. An SUV or pickup truck would be preferred, for the height. Nevermind that if you're alone, you likely aren't going to make it. Gotta sleep eventually.

A bike is still useful. Just not for transportation. First thing I would loot would be components to make a bicycle powered electric generator. Just because it's Z-Day doesn't mean I have to be bored to death waiting it out.
 
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YES! IT'S ON BITCHES!

this is what i've been waiting for

it's time for the apocolypse!

weapon of choice: 9mm baretta w/silencer

more realistic, prolly a machete or a mace or some sort
 
Zombie Survival Guide is retarded for this one thing. You tire out on a Bike, and don't cover much ground. Cars can go for hours. An SUV or pickup truck would be preferred, for the height. Nevermind that if you're alone, you likely aren't going to make it. Gotta sleep eventually.

A bike is still useful. Just not for transportation. First thing I would loot would be components to make a bicycle powered electric generator. Just because it's Z-Day doesn't mean I have to be bored to death waiting it out.

Cars run out of gas and bikes can move through enclosed areas much better...

They actually go over the pros and cons of each both cars and bikes.
 
Cars run out of gas and bikes can move through enclosed areas much better...

They actually go over the pros and cons of each both cars and bikes.

Cars aren't exactly difficult to refuel. Not to mention that so long as you aren't running at a quarter of a tank to begin with, you'll be able to get out of pretty much any danger zone. Enclosed areas are the places you want to avoid when Zombies are running amok.


I'd be more worried about a break down than running out of fuel. Ofcourse, bikes can have their chains slip off the gears.


Regardless, the most valuable thing in this kind of event? Someone who is good with food. I don't mean just cooking either. Someone who knows how to preserve food using smokers and brines.
 
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Cars aren't exactly difficult to refuel. Not to mention that so long as you aren't running at a quarter of a tank to begin with, you'll be able to get out of pretty much any danger zone. Enclosed areas are the places you want to avoid when Zombies are running amok.

it really doesnt matter to me either, i know where ill be at when the out break starts
 
xbox.jpg
 

Hell yeah, blunt force trauma for the win!

I dunno about that bike thing: If you're just trying to get to one point a car'll probably do you good, but the ZSG made from good points for using a bike instead. Its alot more mobile; In a city or highway there's going to be dead vehicles all over the road, and in most cases completely shut down any roads. A bike can weave around those things due to being much smaller. The other problem with those cars is that IF you wind up in a dead end, that engine's going to make alot more noise than you realize. After the initial wave of chaos, things are going to get real quiet in a city and a single engine can make enough noise to be heard for blocks in all directions.

As I write this I can hear the traffic from the closest four-lane road that's about five blocks away. A bike won't have that problem.

Other'n that, a car won't tire you out, 60 mph will leave just about anything zombie-like in the dust and has the added bonus of being enclosed, just in case something does happen to get close.

...Man, I want some zombies to show up now. I love me some zombies.
 
Weapon of choice: Sword with smaller knifes. A gun if I can find one.
Plan: Raid the local Sam's Club to gather supplies and get the fuck out of town. I'm about five miles outside a big city so I would be in the prime danger zone. I know of a farm that's out in the middle of no where but getting there would be an issue since I would have to go through populated areas to get there first. My friends and I are still coming up with a really good plan for a zombie invasion though. Soon enough....
 
Regardless, the most valuable thing in this kind of event? Someone who is good with food. I don't mean just cooking either. Someone who knows how to preserve food using smokers and brines.

I knew going to culinary school for 2 years wouldn't be wasted!
 
Blunt objects 4tw.
 
First off, what kind of zombie are we talking about. The Romero slow-walkers, or the fast-movers from the more recent zombie flicks?

I think I'd go with:

survival%20knife%20type%20IV%2012-28-07.JPG


(cleaned up of course) as my weapon of choice.

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As for auto vs bike; autos will only be helpful as long as there is a quick, easy way to get fuel. Once that stops (stations dry up, abandoned cars all siphoned, pumps go offline, etc.) they'll become a liability.
 
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