Anyone who knows something about the law, with guardianship, please post

[Ronith]

Okay I need some serious legal help/advice, my girlfriend is 15, and will be 16 in a few months, and her mom, is a complete and total psychopath, and she does nothing but hurt my girl mentally, does nothing but cut her down, and always falls back on a religion stand point... her brother is almost 20, and wants to protect her from her mom, and often times stands inbetween them when they fight

I was wondering is there ANYTHING and I mean ANYTHING AT ALL that I can do? to help????? I mean she is making my girl Shake and Shiver like she's having a stress induced seizure or some shit, she was hospitilized for one a couple months ago cause of her mom's stupid fucking arguements

I need to do something, but as soon as I pick her up to take her to the police station, or the hospital I'll be arrested for Kidnapping, and yes I'm 18yrs of age, but seriously I need anything, and I mean anything at all to help her, I love her to death and I can't let this happen to her, she's going to end up dead after one of these times, and her mom wont do anything about it, even when she collapsed and had her seizure a couple months ago, and it's really worrying me, please... anyone

 

[Calv/Godofdeath]

Are you 16 or 18? Kinda say one here and another there... IF your 18 and you have a job, I'd call the cops on her mom then go to trial and have your girflfriend and her brother testify whats been going on and maybe the state will let her leave her moms household. Worth a shot.

 

[Ronith]

I said she's 15 almost 16, and I'm 18

 

[Ronith]

Are you 16 or 18? Kinda say one here and another there... IF your 18 and you have a job, I'd call the cops on her mom then go to trial and have your girflfriend and her brother testify whats been going on and maybe the state will let her leave her moms household. Worth a shot.

I am one step away from doing that really, but I'm afraid her dad will step in and take her guardianship, but the thing is her dad just out of jail last month for a bar brawl where he hit 3 cops, and almost killed a guy, so i'm sure it wont be hard to get her away from that guy

 

[Vondoom]

I'm no lawyer, but it seems to me that if the brother is so concerned, than perhaps he should step up and report issues to the proper authorities. Keep in mind however, involving CPS or any other form of state/federal social service does not guarantee a favorable outcome due to the fact that she is a minor.

She can seek to become emancipated from her parent, but I believe that requires federally mandated evidence that she is capable of taking care of herself.

The brother could also sue for custody. Doing so would be a long drawn-out process that would require the involvment of proper child welfare officials/inspectors. Additionally, you say you would be arrested for kidnapping, but she cannot. I'd say the onus of immediate action on your g/f's behalf lies on her. There is nothing to stop her from notifying police, a teacher, a friends parent, or any other 3rd party. It seems to me that notifying a teacher at school would have a profound impact on the situation. Most teachers are receptive to reports such as this and have the knowledge and ability to follow up in a less menacing way than say a trip to the Police station. Not to mention a teacher seems the easiest path to take in that they are approachable and accessable.

The best thing for you to do is to stay out of the situation. Such is not to say you shouldn't remain involved in her life, or cease concerning for her well being. Offer her any information/solutions you may come across, but leave official reporting to your g/f or members of her direct family. As easy as it is for you to say "Her mom's screwing her up" it is easier, and sadly far more believable for the mother to counter, "It's him thats doing it. He's 18 years old and he's fucking my daughter."

I'm by no means trying to belittle, or otherwise berate you, your involvment in your g/f's life, or your relationship to her. Just remember that state and federal social services are there to help her, but it is very easy for the mother to counter any efforts and shift blame onto you. If things are as bad as they seem, you wouldn't want to enflame your g/f's abuse with a hasty, or poorly executed third party involvment.

 

[Strid]

I said she's 15 almost 16, and I'm 18

Considering that you at 18 dating a person of either the two ages is illegal, you're going to need to becareful whatever you do. Don't be so quick to pull her mother out of the picture that you don't cover your own ass as she could have you charged as well... and it's not a pretty charge. She needs to apply for emancipation so she can be declaired a legal adult and leave. She'll also need family witnesses not to cower to her mom's defense and testify for her. Good luck and watch yourself... You're skating thin ice here.

 

[Sculli]

The best thing for you to do is to stay out of the situation. Such is not to say you shouldn't remain involved in her life, or cease concerning for her well being. Offer her any information/solutions you may come across, but leave official reporting to your g/f or members of her direct family. As easy as it is for you to say "Her mom's screwing her up" it is easier, and sadly far more believable for the mother to counter, "It's him thats doing it. He's 18 years old and he's fucking my daughter."

QFT.
The mom can get you in so much trouble that you will never ever recover from it.

 

[Kimberely]

I personally would stay back out of the main light. But I think you should talk to her brother about the situation and if he has a job and is capable of supporting his younger sister then he should go to the courts to get custody of her.. just like vondoom and godofdeath said.

His biological tie to her is stronger than your relationship (in the eyes of the court) so they probably wont take you as seriously as him. He would need the hospital records with a doctors statement that the reason she was hospitalized was because of the arguement with her mother. <<<<< that's very important if you want this to work.

 

[decidence]

(18/2) + 7 = 16

Sorry but she is too young for you.

 

[Elemmire]

your girlfriend can call the cops. Since she's under 18 and if she tells the cops what's going on.. ya.. mother will be in deep shit. Last summer I called the cops on my mom and it scared her into submission

 

[Rinoah]

While my knowledge of the legal system in american is flawed at best i do know that the legal age of an adult is 21. Assuming you need to be an adult to be a guardian like in britian (which i figure is more than likely) it might be wise to back off a little and support your gf until her brother turns 18 then have him sue for guardianship rights/custody whatever you call it. Chances are they won't let her go with him before he is 21 and unless he has done some serious shit you haven't mentioned he sounds like a much more likely candidate from a legal and moral point of view for guardian than either the mother or the father.

Of course i full admit i do not know the legal system and if any of what i just said contrdicts that legal system please ignore it. Otherwise i think its probably your, and her best shot.

 

[Elemmire]

They'll let her stay with her brother if he's 18 as long as her brother can support both her and himself. That is.. he needs a full time job and suitable living conditions (i.e. nice house/apartment with water and heat and food and electricity). Most courts won't let an 18 year old brother take care of the sister cause most 18 year olds can barely support their gas costs for their car >.> atleast.. I think that's right (considering legal adult age is 18.. you are confusing adult age with drinking age.. which is funny)

Considering that you at 18 dating a person of either the two ages is illegal, you're going to need to becareful whatever you do. Don't be so quick to pull her mother out of the picture that you don't cover your own ass as she could have you charged as well... and it's not a pretty charge. She needs to apply for emancipation so she can be declaired a legal adult and leave. She'll also need family witnesses not to cower to her mom's defense and testify for her. Good luck and watch yourself... You're skating thin ice here.

it's not illegal to date an 18 year old if you are 16 or 15 it's just illegal if they have sex. Frankly.. 2-3 year age difference isn't a big deal. So meh at the age thing as long as you are both responsible and make good decisions.

 

[Rinoah]

Here in britian the age for being an adult and drinking age are the same so i guess i just assumed it would be the same in america. Silly assumption i guess.

So are you allowed to vote at 18 in america then? (sorry to derail...just curious).

And yeah if the brother is an adult now then i would go with my (and a several other peoples previous plans) minus the waiting for 21!

 

[Elemmire]

ya, vote, smoke, buy pr0n etc all at 18 but you can't drink! whoo

 

[Kimberely]

lol funny note...

I know an 18 year old girl who gained custody of another 18 year old girl.

I actually saw the court papers on this or I wouldn't have believed it.

 

[Vondoom]

ya, vote, smoke, buy pr0n etc all at 18 but you can't drink! whoo

I was awarded a Purple Heart and a Combat Infantrymans Badge when I was 19. Weeeeeeee. Would have prefered a stiff Scotch rather than more shit to worry about on my Class A's.

 

[Langly]

One of my best friends was out of his psychopath parent's house and living on his own working a job to support himself when he was 16. Albeit he didn't finish high school. Later went to get an equivilancy and then onto becoming an Architectural Engineer. He's now 22 with a wife a son and about 100 thousand dollars a year.

It's possible. But you're not in for an easy ride by any stretch of imagination. Listen to what a lot of people have said in this thread. Talk to her brother and her. Find out what everyone feels the most comfortable with. And what's necessary. Good luck Ronith.

 

[Lokkin]

I'm going with what everyone else has said, talk to her brother about gaining custody, considering how lunatic her mother is acting and the fact her father has a criminal record(quite serious too, hitting 3 cops and almost killing a guy?) it shouldn't be that much of a problem for him.

Also agreeing with the, keep as subtle a touch on the ongoings as possible, the mother might be a lunatic, but she'll probably shift the blame to you, you really don't want that to happen. *refrains from arguing with the age critics*

 

[Strid]

it's not illegal to date an 18 year old if you are 16 or 15 it's just illegal if they have sex. Frankly.. 2-3 year age difference isn't a big deal. So meh at the age thing as long as you are both responsible and make good decisions.

Maybe where you live but here in Tejas and in Georgia and Alabama (my two previous places of residence) is serious business to even mess with a youngin'.

 

[Legomyeggo]

I was awarded a Purple Heart and a Combat Infantrymans Badge when I was 19. Weeeeeeee. Would have prefered a stiff Scotch rather than more shit to worry about on my Class A's.

I won a stop watch from Pizza hut. WHAT NOW?!