Is it wrong to date a girl, just because she plays FFXI?

love is a strange feeling that can take different forms, you dont need to see someone to kno you like them... by talking and having fun with whoever online, they get to kno you.. and by your actions .. trust you, trust is a major factor within a relationship... "love has no boundaries"

:twisted: wAcKy :twisted:

also note, take a big step from knowing the person in the game, to rl.. if you want to accomplish anything.(communicate outside of the game, phone..etc).. anything can go online, lies.. etc

just like I said, "trust"
 
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wacky.. you ever think about using the magic erase tool on your signature for those center pics?

~nib
 
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if you want me to make ya one just ask :)

i'll even use spell check on your's!! lol..

this is another one i made..
d7c7f74b.jpg


just tell me what you want.. and give me your aim/yahoo/msn messanger.. and i'll talk to ya and get some ideas.. upload 'em while im working on 'em.. i got nothing else to do with my day except call places and sit here reading lol.. might as well play around with photoshop..

~nib
 
Re: ..

Nibble said:
Do you believe you can honestly have feelings for someone from over the internet, without ever meeting, seeing, or talking to that person?

Yup.
You get to know someone alot better through the internet then you would in real life.
It is also much harder to lose those feelings compared to irl where most feelings are just sexual.
 
The Internet was created for online gaming and graphic, sexually deviant acts.

When you combine the two, you have a force that cannot be stopped by mortal man nor nature.


Ask Silvereyes, she knows. 8)
 
Can't say its wrong, it'd be the same as you go for a guy/girl because they like the same music you do or dress the same. and besides common interests in a relationship work better, my parents loved Led Zeppelin and such music back in the day, and because they have such a common interest i think thats why there still togather today, unlike most marriges now are seeming to end in divorce.
 
Re: ..

Legalus said:
Nibble said:
Do you believe you can honestly have feelings for someone from over the internet, without ever meeting, seeing, or talking to that person?

Yup.
You get to know someone alot better through the internet then you would in real life.
It is also much harder to lose those feelings compared to irl where most feelings are just sexual.

Movements, facial expressions, tones... Those mean anything? I can tell you right now I make 1 million dollars a year, drive a porsche and have a house with a six car garrage, but that doesn't mean its real. In real life, I could tell you the same thing, but judging from all the above you could probably tell I am lying. Although those seem to be blatant lies, you cannot tell as easily as you would in real life. You might think the relationship has deep bonds, but how deep are they really? Ask the person you like in game(I am generalizing the people who met in games then began a relationship) to meet outside the game and most would be very hesitant or even refuse to do so. A few might even have love interests outside the game making you nothing more than an in game fantasy. Attraction to people begins with the physical and then moves on beyond that; however, in game you cannot do that. If you were to meet someone outside the game and they were not attractive, you would probably not pursue the relationship any further. Physical attraction is just that important.

Its true, people can start relationships inside of an online game and something more can spring forth from it, but those people are very limited and very lucky. It takes a good leap of faith to trust someone in a game who could very well be nothing like what you imagined. I've met people from online before, a majority of them were nothing like I imagined or said they were and a few were exactly what I imagined(this was not a good thing either). Those that talked big weren't as tough as they said and the ones that acted like asses were just as annoying in real life. I see people say "You can tell what a person is like from how they act online" or "people act the same online as they do in real life" and this is nothing more than a lie. People act online the way they want you to think they are in real life and that is the truth. It is true, some parts of who you are do leak out, but someone else would have a hard time desciphering which of it is the real you.

Gowron said:
Can't say its wrong, it'd be the same as you go for a guy/girl because they like the same music you do or dress the same. and besides common interests in a relationship work better, my parents loved Led Zeppelin and such music back in the day, and because they have such a common interest i think thats why there still togather today, unlike most marriges now are seeming to end in divorce.

A single common interest is not sufficient to sustain a relationship. My parents are both together and its very rare for parents to stay married now(I believe divorce rate is now at 51%). I know for a fact its not because they had one thing in common but rather a lot more. Although your parents had a common interest that is not what kept their marriage strong, its the common interest that started their interest in each other and blossomed more interest. Had it not been for the many other factors besides that one, your parents probably would not have fallen in love.

Starting a relationship on the internet has many disadvantages. Distance, lack of contact, language barriers, among many other things. Long distance relationships are always bad. The lack of physical contact between two people can tear an otherwise healthy relationship apart and being online one almost guarantees to be long distance. Time differences also come into play. Someone who lives in the US can have a difficult time interacting with someone who lives in the UK. These are just a few of the problems you face that a normal relationship does not.

I am not dismissing online relationships entirely, its just that a relationship has a very difficult path but to add to the problems faced, almost dooms it to certain death from the very begining.
 
Re: ..

Nibble said:
i dunno if its wrong or pathetic..

for the most part everyone wants to feel loved and needed.. no one likes to feel lonely and useless do they? even in "cyber space" people reach out to one another via chat rooms and emails.. and most often they do ONLY SHARE ONE common interes together when they first meet or start talking.. one interest most often leads to you and that other person soon sharing more interests.. which can lead to true feelings.. even if they start out fake.. there have been quite a few ppl who have "hooked up" over ffxi.. however that number is EXTREMELY small compared to how many ppl "hook up" over the internet all together..

..now here's another question..

Do you believe you can honestly have feelings for someone from over the internet, without ever meeting, seeing, or talking to that person?

~nib

I like what Nib said... :O

and off topic: Nice poem Nibbs I like that alot (In your sig)
 
Re: ..

Nibble said:
..meeting someone from the internet is a good show of NOT being shallow..

you cant base your judgements on them on anything EXCEPT their peronality..

dating online is a good way to get to know the person..

everyone is shallow to some degree.. im sure none of you will walk up to anyone from the opposite sex if they arent physically attractive.. or have some visible flaws..

meeting someone online you skip past all of that.. you can see the personality first.. if your personalities clash then you go your seperate ways.. but if they mesh then you can get to know the person further.. which leads to sending picture.. emails.. and such.. if the person isnt physically attractive to you, or they have some visible flaw.. if you already have feelings for that person.. and you love their personality.. it might help you look past the physical and focus on who they are.. if not.. the worst that can happen is you say you arent interested in them that way.. and if you keep it civil you have just made a friend...


as for me asking if you ppl believe you can have feelings for someone over the internet, without ever meeting, seeing, or talking to that person.. well i believe you can.. lets take an example.. ive never met teppo, aysia, alyssan, odon, zaltana, bajaratt, or anyone else for that matter, from ffxi.. other than tep and odon i have no idea what those ppl i named look like.. or sound like.. and ive never met anyone from ffxi IRL.. now.. if any of those ppl.. or anyone else i call "friend" on ffxi ever died.. i'd honestly cry.. and feel sad.. not for the loss of a player on ffxi.. but for a friend who's company i enjoy..

~nib

I always look at the pics first ;)
 
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Movements, facial expressions, tones... Those mean anything?
as we can see many ppl have many different opinions on relationships.. how they start.. work out.. and possibly end.. however, the key to any relationship is trust.. if you trust the person you are with online, and they berak that trust by lies.. you leave them.. >>> if you trust the person you are with IRL, and they break that trust by lies.. you leave them..

Ask the person you like in game(I am generalizing the people who met in games then began a relationship) to meet outside the game and most would be very hesitant or even refuse to do so

this is true also.. alot of people are hesitant to meet someone they know from over a game.. this includes myself.. (sorry tep).. but there is always a reason behind it.. its figuring out that reason "why" they wont meet you that is the key.. some ppl have had bad relationship in the past and find it hard to trust someone else.. therefor stopping any going forward in the relationship.. others may be embarrassed to meet irl.. or shy.. or maybe they lie? there are many reasons.. as many good as bad.. again it goes back to trust..

i also wanna note that trust is not given.. its earned.. slowly but surely ppl earn trust.. unless they do something to put a stop on it..

I see people say "You can tell what a person is like from how they act online" or "people act the same online as they do in real life" and this is nothing more than a lie.

this is also true of course.. personally i pride myself on being the same irl as i am on here.. however i do realize that there are some things about me irl that'd i'd want to change and do that unconciously.. (like how im really shy irl, im not shy online..).. its called strength behind the screen..


A single common interest is not sufficient to sustain a relationship.
its not sufficient to sustain a relationship.. but its sufficient enough to begin one.. IRL physicall attraction will have you go up and talk to that good looking guy or girl.. but online its personality attraction that will make you begin talking to someone.. if your personalities mesh then it'll go forward.. if they clash then thats that..

The lack of physical contact between two people can tear an otherwise healthy relationship apart and being online one almost guarantees to be long distance. Time differences also come into play. Someone who lives in the US can have a difficult time interacting with someone who lives in the UK. These are just a few of the problems you face that a normal relationship does not.

ive had some friends actually move in with each other when they were in a long distance relationship, or online one.. try it out for awhile.. if it works it works.. if not they go their own seperate ways.. i also want to note that long distance relationships test the faithfulness of your partner.. and also makes you question how much you love that person, and if its worth it.. which alot of ppl might see that as a bad thing.. but i dont.. its good to question your love for someone.. if you dont think its not gunna work then its not going to.. if you feel like your slipping appart from each other, then you probably are.. "theres always more fish in the sea" as they say.. just gotta move on and try again with someone else.. and not let the "breaking up" part of it turn into some childish game.. or turn hurtful.. seems like alot of ppl have trouble being adults instead of children..

I am not dismissing online relationships entirely, its just that a relationship has a very difficult path but to add to the problems faced, almost dooms it to certain death from the very begining.
try it you might like it.. you dont have to "fall in love over the internet" but you can always find male or female companionship.. someone to play the game together with.. enjoy the time you two spend together.. having someone to look forward to seeing online every day is a great way to stay interested in this game.. without tep i'd have left a long time ago.. i look forward to comming back to ffxi now just to laugh and joke around with him.. it also is a great stress reliver to have someone to complain to or to laugh with..

just a few points to think on..

~nib

p.s. im happy you like my poem ronith :D tep's been the inspiration for alot of my poems..
 
wow you guys really got into this... It was just a question...LOL. I'm kinda wierd and ask crazy stuff like that. IRL I'm engaged and my Fiance hates all games except online bingo(how you could like BINGO is beyond me). I've always joked that if I found a woman who likes football and videogames, I marry her. Unfortunately my fiance like neither >_<
Although she doesn't give me problems for playing ffxi. I got it on the Ps2 and PC, so when one wants the comp, the other has the TV, and vice versa. But hey, thanks for replying. And for the record, if she ever cost me a scorpion harness....I'd kill her, not dump her... JKJKJK :twisted:
 
Re: ..

Lavi said:
Movements, facial expressions, tones... Those mean anything? I can tell you right now I make 1 million dollars a year, drive a porsche and have a house with a six car garrage, but that doesn't mean its real. In real life, I could tell you the same thing, but judging from all the above you could probably tell I am lying. Although those seem to be blatant lies, you cannot tell as easily as you would in real life. You might think the relationship has deep bonds, but how deep are they really? Ask the person you like in game(I am generalizing the people who met in games then began a relationship) to meet outside the game and most would be very hesitant or even refuse to do so. A few might even have love interests outside the game making you nothing more than an in game fantasy. Attraction to people begins with the physical and then moves on beyond that; however, in game you cannot do that. If you were to meet someone outside the game and they were not attractive, you would probably not pursue the relationship any further. Physical attraction is just that important.

Its true, people can start relationships inside of an online game and something more can spring forth from it, but those people are very limited and very lucky. It takes a good leap of faith to trust someone in a game who could very well be nothing like what you imagined. I've met people from online before, a majority of them were nothing like I imagined or said they were and a few were exactly what I imagined(this was not a good thing either). Those that talked big weren't as tough as they said and the ones that acted like asses were just as annoying in real life. I see people say "You can tell what a person is like from how they act online" or "people act the same online as they do in real life" and this is nothing more than a lie. People act online the way they want you to think they are in real life and that is the truth. It is true, some parts of who you are do leak out, but someone else would have a hard time desciphering which of it is the real you.

A single common interest is not sufficient to sustain a relationship. My parents are both together and its very rare for parents to stay married now(I believe divorce rate is now at 51%). I know for a fact its not because they had one thing in common but rather a lot more. Although your parents had a common interest that is not what kept their marriage strong, its the common interest that started their interest in each other and blossomed more interest. Had it not been for the many other factors besides that one, your parents probably would not have fallen in love.

Starting a relationship on the internet has many disadvantages. Distance, lack of contact, language barriers, among many other things. Long distance relationships are always bad. The lack of physical contact between two people can tear an otherwise healthy relationship apart and being online one almost guarantees to be long distance. Time differences also come into play. Someone who lives in the US can have a difficult time interacting with someone who lives in the UK. These are just a few of the problems you face that a normal relationship does not.

I am not dismissing online relationships entirely, its just that a relationship has a very difficult path but to add to the problems faced, almost dooms it to certain death from the very begining.

Lavi, my friend, you hit the nail on the head with a two ton hammer. :D Having had both great and horrible experiences with relationships that perpetuated in FFXI, I can attest to everything you stated.

When I first started playing this game (this was my first ever MMO) I always thought ...how the hell can someone "fall" for someone by just reading text?? Then it happened to me :lol: ..and although it didn't quite work out the way I thought it would, I still gained a very good friend in the process. I took a different route though, I'm a person who needs actual interaction with someone in RL before really putting my eggs in one basket. So what do I do? I call that person and or actually fly out to see them lol..ahem. Physically being around someone is vital to getting to know someone better. As Lavi said, movements, tones, facial expressions, that look in their eye at that point in time.. These can NOT be replaced with "descriptions" . An emoted kiss has no weight to actually holding that woman's hand for the first time and seeing / feeling that they have RL manhands that could use some moisturizer. (this is based off my horrible experience :wink: )
 
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