Party of the year! (Omfg help me!)

Getting 2 girls to come over and learn ya what a drilldo is would be my recommendation, since that is neither intense or extreme. Sexual, sure. But hey pal, you're in the driver's seat.
 
Mistra said:
No alcohol, and no sex? How the fuck are you planning on having any fun?
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Chances are you have college coming in your near future, if this is the lifestyle you prefer i recommend you go local especially if you only have $70

the church groups do some pretty neat parties so long as you remain 12 inches apart when you "Bust a move" (that means dance, sorry if it seems violent) these are usually BYOB, Bring Your Own BloodOfChrist

if i had $70 my party:

$10 worth of soda

1 Copy of "Harold and Kumar Go To White Castle"

A Crave Crate of White Castles (100 for $57)

Everyone wins and you got a theme, and if your smart you charge money for the bathroom to recoup your expenses, and people WILL go to the bathroom after some WC
 
A person is never to old to make out with random people for 7 minutes.

Or you could just have your Gf over and buy a barry white tape and get a "special" present from her.
 
Rufus_Shinra said:
My bad.

Update: No alchohol, drugs or items of intense sexual nature.
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You're 18 and don't drink, fuck, or do drugs... where the fuck do you live? Utah? People in Utah at least fuck.

Well I guess you still got violence...
 
One word.

Bowling.
 
Phraust said:
You're 18 and don't drink, fuck, or do drugs... where the fuck do you live? Utah? People in Utah at least fuck.

Well I guess you still got violence...
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Chill hot shot. He is asking for help not to clown on him >.>
 
I don't remember my 18th birthday.

That's how wasted I got.

Buuuut, since you don't have alcohol, I suppose you could light the field on fire, running around screaming "Satan made me do it!". Those that don't laugh will, offcourse, freak out. But you'll atleast be remembered. And that's the important part, no? You'll deffinently be the center of attention :p
 
Wet T-Shirt DDRing. Rawr.



Party out in a field...I dunno, get a big hammer and some vegetables? I really dunno, $70 won't go too far, and a field isn't exactly the funnest place to be...maybe if you had an arcade or something but again, $70 won't go that far...

...How do you own an internet domain when you're not even old enough for a credit card, if I may ask? =P
 
For my 18th birthday my mom had me go with my uncle to get a keg...omfg that bitch was heavy. I had the pleasure of drinking the first cup from the tapped keg...it tasted like corn chips.

To those that feel like bashin on him for not having sex, drugs, or alcohol...

NEITHER DO I! Ok...except the sex part...but his gf is gonna be 16 in December...if he's 18 and she's 16 you know what that is? SWEET STATUTORY BATMAN! He could go to real ass pounding prison...kinda. Seriously though, its not that big a deal that he can't/doesn't have those things. If he's lived without them for 17 years, I don't think him not having them on his 18th b-day is going to make that big a difference. Its his party, so let him have what HE wants.

And mish, I believe that if he has his own checking account he can have a debit card, which CAN function like a credit card. Not entirely sure how that works since I opened my checking account after I turned 18.
 
Honestly you're not going to have an exceptionally memorable party without alcohol, and definately without sex.

My advice to you: Buy as many explosives as you can, and rig up some home made devices because $70 sure as hell isn't going to get you enough to make it worthwhile.
 
I'd say a Fat BBQ, but you need more money.
 
I don't remember my 18th birthday. It was only 4 years ago, and I didn't drink back then, but for some reason I can't remember a thing. It must have been boring, and that makes me sad.

Normally I would recommend hookers and blow, but those are two things on your "no-no" list.

The 'no drinking' thing isn't too big a deal, but I can guarantee someone at your party is gonna have a bottle of something.

If you're going to to the whole 'big field/bonfire' thing, I recommend bringing some cool shit to burn. Examples:

One of those giant wooden McGruff the Crime Dog signs - This can be found at your local park, and dug out in about an hour.
Something from where you work, or better yet, your school
A couch - Trust me, this is awesome.
A table, stolen from a Starbucks - One of the outside tables. It'll burn slow, but because you stole it from Starbucks, it'll feel good.

These are all things my friends and I have burned at bonfires over the years. Good times all around.

Happy Birthday.
 
Ya know considering the whole statutory problem that will occur once you turn 18 i'd suggest grabbing your girlfreind and banging that ass nonstop enough to tide yourself over for the 2-3 months you're gonna be (legally) stuck without. At least have fun the day before the party^^
 
Rufus_Shinra said:
Edit: No alchohol, drugs or items of extreme sexual nature.
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The title of this thread and that statement are extremely contradictory.
 
Yeh, I cant tell you how pissed I would be if I didnt get drunk or laid on my B-day. Your B-day is supposed to be the day both of those things are guaranteed.

I honestly dont know how to throw a party w/o alcohol so I cant help ya.
 
etchdog2000 said:
Yeh, I cant tell you how pissed I would be if I didnt get drunk or laid on my B-day. Your B-day is supposed to be the day both of those things are guaranteed.

I honestly dont know how to throw a party w/o alcohol so I cant help ya.
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I'm missing out D:

Maybe you should just ask the people what they want.
If the older people are strangers to you then they probably will be expecting alcohol.
But I'm guessing this more of a family reunion type setting and you know all the people in which case food and entertainment will suffice.
 
spend the money on a load of Mentos and Diet Coke.


Or Mayonaise.
 
Update!

Alright! Heres what I have so far:

-20 crates of Roman Candles and assorted fireworks. (Yes, I said crates.)

-10 large sheet pizzas of varying tastes.

-7 coolers of assorted pop.

-2 DJ's

-I cut my own firewood. (FREE!)

-$5.00 worth of plastic cutlery/napkins/plates (dollar store lol)

-3 Kiddie Pools (no joke, but filled with water. Not jello or pudding), Water guns, and water balloons.

-Football and Volleyball with net.

-4 go-karts but im not sure if I can use them at the location.

I still have about $25 bucks to drop. Any more suggestions?
 
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Rufus_Shinra said:
-3 Kiddie Pools (no joke, but filled with water. Not jello or pudding), Water guns, and water balloons.
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I don't mean to sound like a dick, but are there going to be 6 year olds at your party?
 
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