child support

Kat said:
And again, look at the statistics.
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Statistics are just that. They are not absolute. They don't describe everyone.

So I guess your poor brother is shunning his duties as a parent, huh? I mean, statistics say so, right?
 
Okay, here is a quote hot off the press from Steve: "Child support is a small price to pay when you bring a child into world."

Again, he lived it with me since Heather was 6. We got married when Heather was 10, and then he did help with her support. He also has lived with Heather having a child when she was 15, and the deadbeat of a father Michael has.

As far as my brother goes, I don't get your point? My brother pays his child support and doesn't complain one iota. It was not his choice for his ex wife to move to Rhode Island and remarry. He got an attorney and tried to fight it. His ex-wife won. He is not bitter about it, and calls Sabrina (his daughter) constantly. She comes here at least once per year, and if she doesn't fly here, he flys there. So again, what's your point where my brother is concerned?

As far as his daughter Nicole is concerned, that is one of those unfortunate circumstances where she is with a mother who has totally turned her against my brother. BUT, he still pays and knows in his heart that once she turns 18, he will rectify the situation. I guess he's just more a man, than some of you other's on this board.
 
See, you can't have it both ways, Kat. You can't claim your brother as being a saint because of the judicial system literally being against him, but then talk down to MO about it.

If you're a White Male, you're literally fucked no matter what you do. If it's a woman, you're sexist. If it's a black person or a mexican, you're racist. If MO does take things to court, chances are, they'll side in favor of his Ex.

You can call him being less of a man, I call him smart for not wasting his time fighting an uphill battle that'll just put him further in the hole. She could theoretically beat his child and feed it scraps, but if he gets a Judge Judy FemiNazi court room, he's boned. Government likes to care, about itself. It'll always side with the little guy, or in this case, gal.
 
And again, I was denying my ex from seeing my daughter. I was threatened with contempt of court and to be thrown in jail IF I denied him his visitation rights further. It cost NOTHING for Mitch to go to the courthouse, file the papers, and get a court date.

To reiterate, child support and visitation are totally different issues as far as a judge and the court system is concerned. Also, you do NOT need money or an attorney to file suit on these issues.
 
Kat said:
And again, I was denying my ex from seeing my daughter. I was threatened with contempt of court and to be thrown in jail IF I denied him his visitation rights further. It cost NOTHING for Mitch to go to the courthouse, file the papers, and get a court date.

To reiterate, child support and visitation are totally different issues as far as a judge and the court system is concerned. Also, you do NOT need money or an attorney to file suit on these issues.
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Woah slow down there, pardner. No one said anything about attorneys? But you do need to attend, which would require a day off, which could lead to missing work hours.

Remember what I said about Personal Experience, right? And how statistics aren't absolute? You might have been held in contempt over it, but MO's Ex might not. Like I said. White Male, bottom of the "Government Image" chain when it comes to publicity, no one wants to hear about a Mother losing care of thier child to the father. It's been drilled into your(and many others) head, obviously by your stance, that most men aren't interested, so it just sounds bad, when in reality, it could be a much better environment for the child. But hey, Mother knows best right? Fuck the Father.
 
Isn't losing a day or two from work worth it to a father to try? Whether they lose or win, at least you can try. The point again is, quit whining and do something. If you don't at least try, then don't whine or bitch.
 
Kat said:
Furthermore a practicing attorney in Family Law?
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Yep. About 1/2 of my practice is as a law guardian in family court, representing the children's interests in custody and juvenile delinquency proceedings. The other 1/2 of my practice is criminal. I used to represent spouses in matrimonial cases, but I got sick of the court's bias and stopped taking them.
 
resipsa said:
Yep. About 1/2 of my practice is as a law guardian in family court, representing the children's interests in custody and juvenile delinquency proceedings. The other 1/2 of my practice is criminal. I used to represent spouses in matrimonial cases, but I got sick of the court's bias and stopped taking them.
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Then you should know being in children's interest part of the law, that isn't the men who are shafted from divorce, it isn't the women who are shafted from divorce, it's the children. A statement such as the one you made is totally bogus and again I'm calling bullshit on it.
 
Kat said:
Then you should know being in children's interest part of the law, that isn't the men who are shafted from divorce, it isn't the women who are shafted from divorce, it's the children. A statement such as the one you made is totally bogus and again I'm calling bullshit on it.
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Oh well. I can live with you not believing me.

In any event, in custody proceedings the court asks me to make a recommendation as to who should be the custodial parent. Sometimes I recommend mom, sometimes I recommend dad. The court has never accepted my recommendation when I say dad.

When I used to represent men in divorces, I frequently saw the court give child support/equitable distribution/spousal maintenance awards that vastly exceeded his disposable income. Orders that clearly, on their face, he could not comply with and still be able to eat.

That's MY experience.
 
You can call him being less of a man, I call him smart for not wasting his time fighting an uphill battle that'll just put him further in the hole. She could theoretically beat his child and feed it scraps, but if he gets a Judge Judy FemiNazi court room, he's boned. Government likes to care, about itself. It'll always side with the little guy, or in this case, gal.
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thats correct, but to also she light on why i would be screwed any more is because she made a false statement and had a restraining order put on me for being abusive. it was a total bs lie but guess what. it was enough for her to get into a program for abused spouses and get housing free. this also has me restricted from having a majority of parental rights. so guess what kat. your not the only one that has been screwed over. i tried my hardest to not throw out my dirty laundry for everyone to see, but apparently that wasnt gonna be good enough for u. women are NOT the only ones that get screwed over. case in point-ME thank you have a nice day and stop thinking women are holier than thou
 
masterorion said:
thats correct, but to also she light on why i would be screwed any more is because she made a false statement and had a restraining order put on me for being abusive. it was a total bs lie but guess what. it was enough for her to get into a program for abused spouses and get housing free. this also has me restricted from having a majority of parental rights. so guess what kat. your not the only one that has been screwed over. i tried my hardest to not throw out my dirty laundry for everyone to see, but apparently that wasnt gonna be good enough for u. women are NOT the only ones that get screwed over. case in point-ME thank you have a nice day and stop thinking women are holier than thou
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also to mention, because of her bold face lies to get her revenge so to speak, these lies tarnished my reputation. do u honestly think that if i stood in front of a court to plead my case to get any type of custody, that it would actually go in my favor? no. it wont. you can say that it could till your blue in the face. but i can already guarantee that it will be no. im working on finding a way to get around that atm. its not looking pretty but im attempting. at the same time, im not going to make waves until im ready to try to go all out and fight it.
 
Again Master, there are ways to fight that. I'm sorry your ex is a real piece of work, but as I've said throughout this whole damn thread, it is the relationship you have with your son that is most important.

My ex was a real piece of work let me tell ya. I won't begin to go into what my life was like back then. But, I fought and fought and fought, and finally broke free. I realized that Heather growing up in a healthy environment was worth more to me than staying in an unhealthy one.

That is why you must fight. IF it takes you moving to a location where you can seek employment closer to home and working 2 jobs and whatever else it may take, at least you can say you tried. You maybe may even be able to say you finally achieved your goals. It just depends on how much of a fighter you are.

Personally, I've always worked hard for what I've gotten and I don't give up. It's up to you to decide if your relationship with your son is worth what you may have to go thru to have it.

My brother knew he'd be beating a dead horse by trying to stop his ex further after his initial fight. BUT he made sure to work it to his advantage with her leaving the state.

You just need to figure out how you can do the same.
 
Kat said:
Again Master, there are ways to fight that. I'm sorry your ex is a real piece of work, but as I've said throughout this whole damn thread, it is the relationship you have with your son that is most important.

My ex was a real piece of work let me tell ya. I won't begin to go into what my life was like back then. But, I fought and fought and fought, and finally broke free. I realized that Heather growing up in a healthy environment was worth more to me than staying in an unhealthy one.

That is why you must fight. IF it takes you moving to a location where you can seek employment closer to home and working 2 jobs and whatever else it may take, at least you can say you tried. You maybe may even be able to say you finally achieved your goals. It just depends on how much of a fighter you are.

Personally, I've always worked hard for what I've gotten and I don't give up. It's up to you to decide if your relationship with your son is worth what you may have to go thru to have it.

My brother knew he'd be beating a dead horse by trying to stop his ex further after his initial fight. BUT he made sure to work it to his advantage with her leaving the state.

You just need to figure out how you can do the same.
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and how many times have i said i plan on doing it an already am looking for ways to do it.
problem your not seeing is that if i cause any ripple at all, another boldface lie will get thrown in making it harder.
now that you know a majority of my story...is it only the women that get shafted?
 
And again, my ex used to beat me, the judge didn't care. It was NOT between Mitch and I, it was what was best for Heather. The judge asked me under oath if he had ever hurt Heather. Well of course he never had and I wouldn't lie. Therefore, we were told we had to see a moderator, I must let him have his visitation, and of course he told Mitch he had to start paying his child support. Needless to say, I never denied visitation again. It was another 2 years I think before the state finally went after Mitch and he was told about the paying the arrearages and what not.
 
Kat said:
And again, my ex used to beat me, the judge didn't care. It was NOT between Mitch and I, it was what was best for Heather. The judge asked me under oath if he had ever hurt Heather. Well of course he never had and I wouldn't lie. Therefore, we were told we had to see a moderator, I must let him have his visitation, and of course he told Mitch he had to start paying his child support. Needless to say, I never denied visitation again. It was another 2 years I think before the state finally went after Mitch and he was told about the paying the arrearages and what not.
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do u have a restraining order against him now like my ex does with me? the state is looking for the safety of my son and my ex because of the lie that the state was told. please understand this. im not supposed to even know where they live. what does that tell you. so guess what, its not as easy for me as you so think it is. the problems you have had were quite a while ago. todays times have changed.
 
your still trying to make your point stand. your point is only one case. not everyone has the same situation as you and i. i love my son to death. i would do whatever i can for him. im not a deadbeat. i do want to be in my childs life. women are not so innocent.
what you have gone through is just one instance of the thousands of divorces that happen. your case is not the outline of how all divorces with children, happen.
 
No, I don't now. Heather is 24 years old. But yes I did at the time. He wasn't supposed to be within 500 feet of where I was. Let me tell ya, he defied that order all the friggin' time. That, my friend is another story, which I will not go into.
 
i will tell you flat out, not only is mine to keep me from contact of her, but also to my son. end of story. hopefully you can guess the answer to any statement you have put out with what i have just said
 
I just want to reiterate yet again, Mitch is a totally different person now. After the modification hearings we had to go thru, he realized he needed professional help and sought counciling on his own.

He's a decent person now. A lot can happen in 19 years^^.
 
Kat said:
I just want to reiterate yet again, Mitch is a totally different person now. After the modification hearings we had to go thru, he realized he needed professional help and sought counciling on his own.

He's a decent person now. A lot can happen in 19 years^^.
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god damnit.....none of it ever happened to begin with. it was all a bs lie to get what she wants. there is nothing for me to change. fact is, statements have already been made. the most fit person to hold custody, in the courts eyes, will be the mother for obvious reasons. there is no joint custody there is no part custody period. i get to see my son if my wife isnt on teh fuckin rag and having a chip on her shoulder. because guess what, since i cannot afford a vehicle to go 20-30 miles to see him, i have to wait for her schedule to free up.
and, do u know why i dont have a vehicle? could it possibly be that its one of those expenses that i cannot afford atm because i have to choose between paying for my son, or having a car?
 
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