Raising Kids...

Westyle said:
Ass Beatings!!!
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I agree... So many bad kids now days. I like to remind people while their child is crying and verbally abusing them that an ass whooping would take care of that now and in the future. Good game for pushover pussy parenting. Seriously if you are afraid to discipline a child just don't breed the last thing this world needs is more softie crybabies. Time out chairs, "now little Danny stop that", and "go to your room your grounded for a week" is worthless. I'd like to just take my belt off everytime I go somewhere and help parents out here in Texas. They fail horribly at teaching respect and discipline to children around here...
 
Strid said:
I agree... So many bad kids now days. I like to remind people while their child is crying and verbally abusing them that an ass whooping would take care of that now and in the future. Good game for pushover pussy parenting. Seriously if you are afraid to discipline a child just don't breed the last thing this world needs is more softie crybabies. Time out chairs, "now little Danny stop that", and "go to your room your grounded for a week" is worthless. I'd like to just take my belt off everytime I go somewhere and help parents out here in Texas. They fail horribly at teaching respect and discipline to children around here...
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i know some people from texas not saying who but here children r good and do what is told of them
 
Strid said:
I agree... So many bad kids now days. I like to remind people while their child is crying and verbally abusing them that an ass whooping would take care of that now and in the future. Good game for pushover pussy parenting. Seriously if you are afraid to discipline a child just don't breed the last thing this world needs is more softie crybabies. Time out chairs, "now little Danny stop that", and "go to your room your grounded for a week" is worthless. I'd like to just take my belt off everytime I go somewhere and help parents out here in Texas. They fail horribly at teaching respect and discipline to children around here...
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Wow...actually I'd say people like you shouldn't breed. Way to go for ignorance.
 
Well i'm not a parent, so i can't really chime in with "I raised my kid this way and they turned out ok" But i always felt the best way to go about thinks was to set a shitload of rules, have various punishments for breaking them, and possibley most importantly compromise as they get older. Who wants to be treated at 15-16 the same they did when they were about 10? and in my opinion its not really preparing them for real life, come the day they have to do all this stuff themselves they will not have half a clue.

As for beatings...meh i would say they are a last resort. I have recieved under 10 i would estimate over my short lifetime, and i would like to think i turned out ok. Besides its probably better to teach them why not to do something or let them experience the mistake themselves, that just plain ban them from doing it and add another thing to their list of "what i am going to do as soon as i move out).

Now i will let you parents get back to argu....debating. ;)
 
Kiere said:
A child's worth should NEVER be determined by their behavior. Your daughter is always a good daughter...address the behavior..not the person.
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BS. As an adult your child will be judged by his behavior. That's pretty much all we have to go by in judging other people's character.

A person who consistently behaves badly will be judged by others to have bad character, no matter what a "good person" he thinks he is.

Children should start learning that at an early age.
 
Spare the rod spoil the child.
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Beatings was the way i raised when i was bad, and i choose to carry this on when i have kids. More parents need to give a kid a good smack when there bad, i believe it has more of a positive impact.

Best Example: i work at a grocery store and i was put on register one night, I hear a little kid yelling at his mother, something about waffles, then the little boy proceeds and starts to bug about Doughnut holes on the entenmann's shelf. The mother tells the little boy he choose waffles and thats what he was getting. Then he starts whining about it and would not give up the doughnut holes. As the mother payed for her stuff and began to leave this little boy refused to leave the store w/ out those doughnut holes, and throw the biggest tantrum i had ever seen cring and rolling on the floor, screming, etc. The funny thing is my manager was standing watching, and i think about to crack up at the site of this. What was the mother doing tring to grab his arm and leave. Now If the mother had probably just smacked the kid upside the head, he probably would of listened.

If i had done such a thing as a child my mom would have said "I'll give you something to cry about" then dragged me to the bathroom and give me a good ass beating.
 
I think that's the main reason why I may never have children, I'm afraid of messing them up.

sure I have a lot of love and compassion to share with kids, but to be fully responsible, just kinda scares me i suppose.
 
Gowron said:
If i had done such a thing as a child my mom would have said "I'll give you something to cry about" then dragged me to the bathroom and give me a good ass beating.
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Quoted for truth and my kids will feel the same way... whenever they happen.
 
Kiere said:
Wow...actually I'd say people like you shouldn't breed. Way to go for ignorance.
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It's okay, while your children are crying and hollaring like idiots making them look down right rotten and you a fool I'll be kicked back relaxing while mine is acting like a decent human being. It's not ignorance it's just not letting a damn kid > you or anyone else they are around, i.e. teachers, babysitters etc. I don't know what you people think telling someone "no" a thousand times does or to "stop" a million but I bet it's out of your own ignorance you think it might just make them behave...Whip out your ol' leather buddy and discipline a child the world doesn't need any more of your pushover momma's boys or daddy's lil angels.
 
:mad: Just checking to make sure this debate stays civil...just a GENTLE reminder that this is not the flamboard, kids. <3

That being said - I am ok with spankings...I am the oldest of 4, and we were all spanked when we were younger, but only really the ages where a good whack on the butt would get your attention. (when kids are little I think sometimes that is all they understand) But when you are old enough to understand what you did is wrong - I think that getting grounded from TV is a way worse situation then getting spanked.

I just hate seeing a 7 year old being yanked around by her arm in the Supermarket because she asked her overly-stressed mom for a candy bar. Or when a 5 year old flinches when he spills his juice. That shit isn't neccessary.
 
jender said:
:mad: Just checking to make sure this debate stays civil...just a GENTLE reminder that this is not the flamboard, kids. <3

That being said - I am ok with spankings...I am the oldest of 4, and we were all spanked when we were younger, but only really the ages where a good whack on the butt would get your attention. (when kids are little I think sometimes that is all they understand) But when you are old enough to understand what you did is wrong - I think that getting grounded from TV is a way worse situation then getting spanked.

I just hate seeing a 7 year old being yanked around by her arm in the Supermarket because she asked her overly-stressed mom for a candy bar. Or when a 5 year old flinches when he spills his juice. That shit isn't neccessary.
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Exactly... when I posted this yesterday I didnt expect it to grow into a flame, or anything of the sort... but really I wasnt talking about if the kid beat the shit out of another kid just say something to him and let it go w/o punishment...

hence why i gave such an example with the supermarket :p jender hit it just right IMO^^
 
Strid said:
It's okay, while your children are crying and hollaring like idiots making them look down right rotten and you a fool I'll be kicked back relaxing while mine is acting like a decent human being. It's not ignorance it's just not letting a damn kid > you or anyone else they are around, i.e. teachers, babysitters etc. I don't know what you people think telling someone "no" a thousand times does or to "stop" a million but I bet it's out of your own ignorance you think it might just make them behave...Whip out your ol' leather buddy and discipline a child the world doesn't need any more of your pushover momma's boys or daddy's lil angels.
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Do you even have children??

I do..I have a 10 year old son and a 13 year old daughter so I am not just talking out my ass like so many on here. Both of my children have on (rare) occasion had spankings (could probably count on 1 hand for each...and was no more than one or two pops on the butt). I am by NO means a pushover. My children know exactly what is excpected of them and what the consequences are. As I said...consistency is the most important..that and following through. When my children were younger and they didn't "immediately" do what I asked of them..I would start to count and by the time I hit "2" they were moving! Not out of fear of me hurting them. As far as I'm concerned...if "ass beatings" are how you are planning on raising your child..then YOU are the lazy one. It takes patience, courage and love and a selflessness you'll apparently never understand to raise a happy, healthy well behaved member of society.

My kids come to my office after school everyday because we live outside their school district. I work in an office with over 70 people and I get comments EVERY DAY on how well behaved my children are.

My question to those of you who feel that spankings are the only way to discipline a child is this...Why have children? Do you believe that children are belongings? How bout when you screw up at work or piss off your wife by not taking out the garbage she gets to slap you?
 
Kiere said:
How bout when you screw up at work or piss off your wife by not taking out the garbage she gets to slap you?
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I would tell her that feminism won the fight for equality and to get off her ass and take it out herself. :)
 
Spanking/beatings are the way forward. I look on the news and such and on the streets I see so MUCH anti-social behaviour, it's messed up. I live in a village where it was once a nice perfect and peaceful place to be in. Ever since they built those new houses down the road from where I lived, things took a U-Turn. People that lived there were mainly parents with kids and didn't give a damn about the kids (8-15 year olds) (or cared much for what they do). The evidence is clear after a while because them kids were just complete idiots with not much common sense.

And because of THIS, slowly over time (I lived there for 12 they "poisoned" the village. It even influenced a lot of other kids too in the area. What was once a safe village is now some yob driven village. Kids wandering around, being bored, going into shops causing a nuisance, smoking/taking drugs, windows broken, plants upturned/destroyed, graffiti, and recently at Christmas a car got set alight (and blown up).

All this, is a result of lack of "showing the child who's boss" (discipline? I can't spell it right now!). The parents now have trouble controlling the kids they don't even try anymore.
 
LadyKiKi said:
Spanking/beatings are the way forward. I look on the news and such and on the streets I see so MUCH anti-social behaviour, it's messed up. I live in a village where it was once a nice perfect and peaceful place to be in. Ever since they built those new houses down the road from where I lived, things took a U-Turn. People that lived there were mainly parents with kids and didn't give a damn about the kids (8-15 year olds) (or cared much for what they do). The evidence is clear after a while because them kids were just complete idiots with not much common sense.

And because of THIS, slowly over time (I lived there for 12 they "poisoned" the village. It even influenced a lot of other kids too in the area. What was once a safe village is now some yob driven village. Kids wandering around, being bored, going into shops causing a nuisance, smoking/taking drugs, windows broken, plants upturned/destroyed, graffiti, and recently at Christmas a car got set alight (and blown up).

All this, is a result of lack of "showing the child who's boss" (discipline? I can't spell it right now!). The parents now have trouble controlling the kids they don't even try anymore.
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Wheres this too? Near birmingham/manchester?
 
This is a symptom of parents not paying attention to their kids...

Spankings do not = paying attention.

Just because you don't beat your kids doesn't mean you aren't making them behave.
 
Kiere said:
Do you even have children??
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I'd bet large sums of money that the answer is "No".
 
alanon said:
I'd bet large sums of money that the answer is "No".
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I don't have kids but I use babysit for people like you guys who needed to beat their children senseless. Was kind of funny once I had the ol' man convinced he needed to take some charge and he started crakin that whip. They straightened up until mommy got all pissy and he backed down like a chump. Which is another problem for another time...

I belive how I was raised was the right way and only way to raise a kid. There are no heatherns in my family or no shakey whimps. When we messed up we got a whippin' and eventually we learned not to mess up to the extent it took to get one. No one ever died from a whippin' and if you cried you got another lick. God forbid you stick your hand back there. When you got a paddling at school (which now days is ground for lawsuit..chumps) you knew as soon as you got home you'd get another. It sucked but as I moved out to Texas and started seeing the way a lot of children act here I'm thankful for every ass whoppin' I ever got. I don't believe in this suburbanite bullshit raising that seems to be slowly killing the wit/balls of this country and I never will. Call me ignorant I call you weak the wheel keeps turning you get nothing accomplished and neither will I. Take another shot at me and waste some more time why dont you?
 
A little background:

I never got my ass beat unless property damage exceeded $500 or i flat out was asking for it (most teenage boys blatantly ask for an assbeating from an authoritive figure at one point or another, i earned a few in my day.) My stepdad was ex-military, we stood at the wall, all of us. I have two step-brothers, regardless of who did what until the truth came out we all stood at attention with our nose on the wall, went 9hrs once ... after standing at a wall for 9hrs you pick up on just getting it over with.

Now .. i'm not really all that keen on the disciplinarian bit, i liked the ideas behind the OP but there is a clear and defined line between acceptable and unacceptable behavior and how to deal with it with consideration to it's severity.

Currently my son is at 14mos so i've had it real easy. The most i have to do is drop my voice an octive and say "no" and have only had to go this far or the occasional light tap on a hand. The child stops, looks at me, ponders for a moment and then i have the cosmic saving throw ... 9/10 he goes on to something else or just laughs and bails out on foot, regardless of the outcome i have a seriously good safety record based on just saying "no".

I'm for positive reinforcement as much as i am a swift pop on the ass when things get heavy, i think the trick is balance. At some point in time i'll have alot more communication options open for me but i figure as is he's got a pretty good handle on what the deal is, i lucked out on the at home dad bit so i know him real well and vice versa. Voice modulation works real well before you kid can talk, if i had to liken it to anything i'd say i've taught him discipline up to this point the same way you would a small puppy .. save without the occasional newspaper swat. Not to say those days aren't coming but i can't imagine with his current actions i'll have many escalations that get out of hand.

Hopefully it'll be alot easier for me to deal with since we basicly spend all our time together. ^^

Everyone warns me about the terrible twos ..... if my kid's anything like me that'll be a cakewalk compared with the teenage years. Anyway, being a parent is a constant highwire act in my experience you've got to have a healthy balance in the relationship with your child. On one hand you have to teach them that if they go ape you will not hesitate to bust that ass; on the other you have to reinforce when they do good on their own or with suggestion to build good behavoir ... IMO both sides of it build character when applied properly.

Too lapse or too overbearing and you just screw it all up.

Aside from that alot of people don't really know or think about the fact that you as a parent are viewed by complete strangers in one way or another based on how your child acts for better or for worse. I can take mine out to dinner and get free stuff just cos he's so well behaved (you'd be amazed how a happy non-screaming baby makes a waitress' day), if i had a dime for everytime i head "what a happy easygoing baby" or "you can tell he's loved" i'd be a millionare.

And that's about all it boils down to: Love em and they'll turn out fine but by no means does love not mean someone gets their ass kicked every once in a while when it's called for.

Edit: on the corporal punishment at school thing for strid; i can dig your POV as much as i disagree with it. At some point when you have kids you may find yourself changing opinions; anyone but me or his mother ever raises a hand to my child it'll be the last goddamn thing they ever do on this earth. That's my place as a parent and no one elses, anyone who thinks it's called for better come to me before fucking up and learned what an assbeating is all about.
 
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In the south, we beat our youngin's, and if we don't feel like a beatin'em at home. WE TAKE'EM TO WAL-MART. NOTHING TO CALM'EM DOWN LIKE A SPANKIN' WITH AN AUDIENCE.


Lol Seriously though. I was raised on spanking. I never got hit in the face, sometimes the belt would slide too high or low, but thats no biggie. I turned out just fine, lol. I don't really have that many issues. o_o; besides a bit of weight. Don't think spanking caused that.

I think Balance is a good thing. Scold, and yet praise. Finding the happy medium is the goal I would think.

(Over simplified half sleep reply (b'-')b )
 
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