About a year ago I went through a point in my life where I had a run-in with the famous gilsellers at onmyway games. And, like a man who thinks of the perfect thing to say to his new ex three hours after breaking up with her, I still had many things I wanted to try out with the sellers before I let them go. I figured forcing an encounter by picking out another address from their website would be too... well, forceful. So I just waited.
Then comes tonight. Minding my own business, when I get my first IM.
What follows is an actual conversation between me and an onmyway representative on AIM. There have been no modifications to the times, the messages, or the content. I do not know shit about the US's current standings in the olympics, or any dealings with WoW (although I assume outlands are some sort of endgame area).
Spoiler:
onmyway200810 (2:23:24 AM):hey, friend, we focus on WOW gold now , 1000g<25$ , delievery in 20 min after receiving your decided order,if you like, welcome to contact me here or by mail: [email protected] Xalioniaf (2:25:28 AM):Hello, friend! onmyway200810 (2:25:32 AM):hey onmyway200810 (2:25:41 AM):sorry to interrupt you Xalioniaf (2:25:45 AM):It's fine. onmyway200810 (2:25:46 AM):[SIZE=-0]
[/SIZE] Xalioniaf (2:25:53 AM):Mind if I ask you a question? onmyway200810 (2:26:08 AM):plz dont be hestate onmyway200810 (2:26:50 AM):what do you hope to get? onmyway200810 (2:27:06 AM):more gold? Xalioniaf (2:27:17 AM):Let me cut right to the chase. Xalioniaf (2:27:19 AM):Give me a blowjob. onmyway200810 (2:28:10 AM):np onmyway200810 (2:28:13 AM):wait onmyway200810 (2:28:35 AM):do you mean if you introduce one of your frineds to me, i should offer you some cash , onmyway200810 (2:28:43 AM):am i right? Xalioniaf (2:28:47 AM):No. Xalioniaf (2:29:00 AM):I mean bend over and give my penis the best you have to offer. onmyway200810 (2:29:39 AM):why do you think like this:? onmyway200810 (2:29:49 AM):you want to buy wow gold from us? Xalioniaf (2:29:57 AM):That's not important. Xalioniaf (2:30:01 AM):Please, try to stay on topic. onmyway200810 (2:30:02 AM):no onmyway200810 (2:30:10 AM):that is the first thing i care Xalioniaf (2:30:17 AM):You don't understand. Xalioniaf (2:30:21 AM):You're trying to change the subject. Xalioniaf (2:30:27 AM):We'll get to this WoW gold thing later. Xalioniaf (2:30:31 AM):But right now, stick to the topic. onmyway200810 (2:30:37 AM):nope , WOW GOLD first onmyway200810 (2:30:50 AM):bec it is my mainly purpose onmyway200810 (2:31:09 AM):of course, that is better if you ar e my customer + friends Xalioniaf (2:31:16 AM):Are you backsassing me? Xalioniaf (2:31:28 AM):I will punch you if you give me that tone of voice again. Xalioniaf (2:31:33 AM):And then we'll have to go back to the doctor. Xalioniaf (2:31:36 AM):And what will you tell them? Xalioniaf (2:31:52 AM):That's right "I fell down the stairs". Xalioniaf (2:31:55 AM):Because let's be honest here. Xalioniaf (2:31:58 AM):You're my bitch. onmyway200810 (2:32:26 AM):are you crazy onmyway200810 (2:32:29 AM):like shit Xalioniaf (2:32:37 AM):No, babe. Xalioniaf (2:32:43 AM):You're crazy. onmyway200810 (2:32:51 AM):if you are gentleman, could we talk it seriously Xalioniaf (2:33:03 AM):I'm the one who paid for your bail, remember? Xalioniaf (2:33:14 AM):I mean, god damnit, do you know how hard it was for me to gather 250k dollars? Xalioniaf (2:33:27 AM):That's why you don't murder people, hon. onmyway200810 (2:33:45 AM):do you have 250k in the us WOW? onmyway200810 (2:33:51 AM):CHEAT Xalioniaf (2:34:05 AM):No, the government took my money from me when I had to bail your ass out of jail. onmyway200810 (2:34:34 AM):so now? Xalioniaf (2:34:51 AM):Now we enter hyperspace, of course. Xalioniaf (2:35:02 AM):Engage. Xalioniaf (2:35:24 AM):BITCH WHY AREN'T YOU ENGAGING Xalioniaf (2:35:29 AM):YOU SEE THIS IS WHY I HIT YOU onmyway200810 (2:35:32 AM):small words Xalioniaf (2:35:39 AM):You are smalltime. onmyway200810 (2:36:12 AM):now , i just want to check your words onmyway200810 (2:36:28 AM):t o be honest , you want to buy or sell your gold? Xalioniaf (2:36:36 AM):That's not important right now. Xalioniaf (2:36:43 AM):Tell me, do you listen to Led Zeppelin? Xalioniaf (2:37:27 AM):What's your favorite zeppelin song? Xalioniaf (2:37:50 AM):Mine's What is and What Should Never Be Xalioniaf (2:37:58 AM):I think you'd like Ramble On. onmyway200810 (2:38:23 AM):hehe , you are good at guessing Xalioniaf (2:38:31 AM):No way. Xalioniaf (2:38:32 AM):Really? onmyway200810 (2:38:39 AM):yeah\\ Xalioniaf (2:38:45 AM):That's badass. onmyway200810 (2:38:48 AM):hey , do you care golds of wow? Xalioniaf (2:38:52 AM):I Xalioniaf (2:38:53 AM):I Xalioniaf (2:38:57 AM):I'll care later. Xalioniaf (2:39:07 AM):But right now, we have more important things to attend to. Xalioniaf (2:39:13 AM):Like me hitting you. Xalioniaf (2:39:30 AM):Babe, I think we should see a mairrage councilor. onmyway200810 (2:39:34 AM):nope ,gold is more important onmyway200810 (2:39:39 AM):haha Xalioniaf (2:39:53 AM):I think I might have a drinking problem, and I wanna be there for you when we have our child. Xalioniaf (2:40:04 AM):Dad said we were sick, but we'll show him a brother and a sister can be a couple. onmyway200810 (2:40:26 AM):wow Xalioniaf (2:40:43 AM):What's wrong babe? onmyway200810 (2:40:52 AM):surprise onmyway200810 (2:40:54 AM):!!!!!!!!!11 Xalioniaf (2:41:01 AM):Hahaha! Happy time! Xalioniaf (2:41:10 AM):Tell me, what kind of music do you listen to over in china? onmyway200810 (2:41:28 AM):how do you know i am in China? Xalioniaf (2:41:35 AM):I traced your IP. Xalioniaf (2:42:02 AM):What do you think of the protesters in beijing? onmyway200810 (2:42:20 AM):http://ting.rrenglish.com/...lesson/03/14.mp3 onmyway200810 (2:42:27 AM):is his song: friends onmyway200810 (2:42:28 AM):right? Xalioniaf (2:43:04 AM):I don't believe so. Xalioniaf (2:43:14 AM):Oh shit, china man. Xalioniaf (2:43:20 AM):Did my connection get knocked out? onmyway200810 (2:43:25 AM):you are shit Xalioniaf (2:43:34 AM):lucy said the same thing to me =( onmyway200810 (2:44:08 AM):hey onmyway200810 (2:44:16 AM):talk about gold now , ok? Xalioniaf (2:44:24 AM):No. Xalioniaf (2:44:28 AM):Let's talk about the olymics. Xalioniaf (2:44:31 AM):Olympics, even. Xalioniaf (2:44:40 AM):How do you feel about the USA pwning all the events? onmyway200810 (2:45:01 AM):nope onmyway200810 (2:45:03 AM):gold first Xalioniaf (2:45:22 AM):I'm ready to spend five hundred dollars on gold, but you have to satisfy me first. Xalioniaf (2:45:33 AM):So talk about the olympics with me. onmyway200810 (2:47:57 AM):if you buy today, even you just pay less than 100$ , after receiving your decided order, we can talk freely Xalioniaf (2:48:13 AM):You don't understand the customer relationship, do you? Xalioniaf (2:48:28 AM):I have to feel confident with my purchase before I'm willing to make the leap. Xalioniaf (2:48:52 AM):And I have odd prefferences for my confiedence, I either have to hit orgasm or feel I know the attendant at a personal level. Xalioniaf (2:49:14 AM):And since I don't condone e-sex (as much as I know you want me <3), we'll have to settle with this. Xalioniaf (2:49:36 AM):So, let's try this again. Xalioniaf (2:49:52 AM):What are your thoughts on Russia's invasion of Georgia? onmyway200810 (2:50:32 AM):maybe i made you misundersand onmyway200810 (2:51:05 AM):bec i am green , i need you buy some golds to help me perswade my boss emply me onmyway200810 (2:51:30 AM):+if i am fired, how to chat with you later? onmyway200810 (2:51:46 AM):how to be maitain the long realationship] Xalioniaf (2:51:47 AM):I guarentee you after you fill my order your boss will make you gold farmer of the month I give you so much business. onmyway200810 (2:51:56 AM):i hope we can be friends forever Xalioniaf (2:52:19 AM):But you have to understand my feelings, you come to me with this random message and before I can feel confident about us I have to know more about your thoughts on certain political matters. onmyway200810 (2:52:56 AM):hehe,, sounds reasonable onmyway200810 (2:53:04 AM):but that is the next topics onmyway200810 (2:53:17 AM):as you said, you will offer many business with me onmyway200810 (2:53:30 AM):but so far , we didnt cooperate one time, how to trust you onmyway200810 (2:53:43 AM):another side, my boss maybe fire me next week onmyway200810 (2:53:51 AM):be c today is the last work day of this week onmyway200810 (2:54:03 AM):there are only 2 hours , my work day will finish onmyway200810 (2:54:19 AM):so i hope we can do something together now Xalioniaf (2:54:27 AM):Ok, how about this then. Xalioniaf (2:54:34 AM):I ask you a simple yes or no question. Xalioniaf (2:54:40 AM):And after that, we can start with my first order? onmyway200810 (2:55:20 AM):ok onmyway200810 (2:55:30 AM):just on e question Xalioniaf (2:55:33 AM):Right. Xalioniaf (2:55:44 AM):Do you believe that water polo players are gay by nature? onmyway200810 (2:57:26 AM):no Xalioniaf (2:57:34 AM):Ok, that's good. Xalioniaf (2:57:43 AM):Now, let me just log onto my character so I can be ready once the order's done. onmyway200810 (2:58:43 AM):why do you logon your char? Xalioniaf (2:59:05 AM):Because I logged off way in outlands and I want to get to a main town first. Xalioniaf (2:59:11 AM):So I don't inconvenience you =) onmyway200810 (2:59:33 AM):oh, you want to bu y the gold for yoru mail char onmyway200810 (2:59:35 AM):? Xalioniaf (2:59:42 AM):Yes. Xalioniaf (2:59:51 AM):Oh crap. onmyway200810 (2:59:54 AM):which server/fraction Xalioniaf (2:59:58 AM):I was banned =( onmyway200810 (3:00:07 AM):oh? onmyway200810 (3:00:12 AM):when? Xalioniaf (3:00:17 AM):I don't know =( Xalioniaf (3:00:25 AM):But they banned my account =( Xalioniaf (3:00:44 AM):No, I'm just kidding. Xalioniaf (3:00:47 AM):I don't play WoW. onmyway200810 (3:00:51 AM):hehe Xalioniaf (3:01:02 AM):It's a really shitty game :/ onmyway200810 (3:01:04 AM):so you just kidding me Xalioniaf (3:01:10 AM):Yeah. Xalioniaf (3:01:12 AM):I had fun though. Xalioniaf (3:02:10 AM):Bye now. onmyway200810 signed off at 3:02:13 AM.
LOL this reminds me of a segment my local rock radio station does called "Dialing for Dingbats" where they set up a special phone number for tele-marketers to call, and the radio DJ's will answer the phone and do and say stuff to make the tele-marketer uncomfortable XD this is good shit here
lol that was good stuff. As a sidenote, I miss rayes and billys :/ one of them even tried to fit in by leveling cooking and being a telewhore, poor little fella.
