The embarrassing thread

Lanien said:
I climbed the side of a McDonalds once.

Drunk.

And naked.
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Pfft. Maybe if a news helicopter spotlighted you then you might have a good story.
 
Khidir said:
In MLA style format? and how many sources will I have to cite?

i'm pretty sure I dont want to google this at school but I'm guessing its fisting
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APA style please. Double Dog you actually can't find on Google *gasp*, but it may be a term that we made up. I don't remember.

Donkey Punch... well, I think you should actually run this section of the paper as a lab. Experiment! Trial and error!

Extra credit: What's 'The Pirate'?
 
Oh yeah...this one time, in like the sixth grade or somthin, I don't remember exactly, somewhere around there, anyway... I was in the bathroom taking a shit and for some unknown reason singing to myself, and apparantly I was singing so loud that it was disturbing the class and the teacher came in and asked me to be quiet. Needless to say when I walked back in the whole class started laughing. That was a cool day.

I also took this pic to masterbate to: http://i20.photobucket.com/albums/b216/Exc_quetz/Exc051118220607a-V.jpg
 
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This one time in 8th grade i held in a poo for about 8 hours. I then used the bathroom at school. It was about a 5 min poop. It was so big it filled the bowl. Like right to the top full. I showed my brother and my friend Danko. Just as we were about to leave the school the janiter went into the bathroom. He shouted "OH MY FUCKING GOD. THAT'S IT! I FUCKING QUIT" I almost passed out from laughing so hard.
 
I miss this thread.

This weekend my friends and I went to a bar.

Me: That chick in the blue? She's kinda hot.
Friend 1: Yeah she is.
Friend 2: I'd like... oh no. No I would not.
Me: What's wrong?
Friend 2: I'm pretty sure that's a guy.
Friend 1: Oh my god. I blame the booze.
Me: Is it bad I still want to have sex with her?
 
oh hey guyz

TODAY I GOT DOWN AND GOT JIGGY WIT IT THEN I TOOK OFF MY PANTS AND SCRATCHED MY TAINT WHERE I HAD A BOIL THAT I NEVER POPPED FOR THREE YEARS AND WHEN I FINALLY POPPED IT IT LOOKED LIKE JIZZ, BUT IT DIDN'T TASTE LIKE JIZZ SO I SCOOPED IT UP AND PUT IT IN A BAG AND WHEN I WENT HOME I SAT AT THE COMPUTER AND FAPPED TO TUBGIRL USING THAT BOIL-JIZZ AS LUBERCANT BUT LITTLE DID I KNOW I DIDNT WIPE GOOD LAST TIME I WENT TO POOP SO THE SMELL OF ROTTEN BOIL-JIZZ, SEMEN, AND ASS FILLED THE ROOM WITH SUCH A WONDERFUL AROMA

ALSO BUMP
 
I leveled bst 1-75 almost exclusively listening to my wife's 70's disco hits cds.

I can't even listen to that shit anymore.
 
Mishaela said:
...What the F-!K.
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If you're referring to me, I have no excuse. Can I plead insanity? Or something?
 
I flew from Atlanta to Vegas one weekend to see Morrisey.
 
When I went to E3 2005, I got so drunk one night with friends that I started throwing up on the side of the road while we drove back to the hotel. Before I knew it, cops were there and basically testing us for our blood-alcohol level. Tested the driver, he was .02 below the limit, we couldn't believe we got that lucky. One more sip and chances are we would have spent the night at a precient on vacation, I still never hear the end of it...
 
lol I never noticed this thread. This is awsome, so many of these stories had my laughing. Kiere's story with the pussy doctor and myrrh's story with the shit in the store though...You guys had my laughing so hard I fell off my chair.

Well I gotta contribute.

When I was an 8th grade I went out one summer afternoon to go for a daily long run. Upon getting about a quarter mile from my house I get this horrible feeling in my stomach. So I start running, and then walking back home; I was ready to explode. So I'm now at my driveway and almost there. I couldn't help it, I was about to blow so I started sprinting. I reach my basement and shit just starts oozing out; I was running up through my house with my hand at the back of pants trying to cork it in, no luck. So I make it to the bathroom and do my thing. I check out the damage to see a 50 foot long trail of diaerrha(sp) throughout my house. My dad saw this trail lol.

When I was 18 on a cruise vacation with my family I got really plastered one night. So I go back to my room at the end of my drinking adventure and go to sleep. I wake up in the middle of the night in my 'pitch black' dark room, and I was all confused on where I was. I literlly didn't know where I was. Well I had to make a big wet ploppy beer shit. And not knowing where I was meant not knowing where the bathroom or light switches were. So I just dropped my pants and went in my hand so I could keep it somewhere until I found the bathroom. Well a lot slipped off my hand and plopped right on the floor. My brother and his friend woke up next. "HOLY FUCKING SHIT WHAT THE HELL IS THAT SMELL, GOD DAMNIT, GROSS". Then I had to clean up what I could while ready to pass out. But the smell stayed until the cleaning people came the next morning, lmao.

I've become so my better these last 2 years at holding myself together, but not before I did some damage.

I think the band hellogoodbye and their hit song "Here(in your arms)" kick ass. It's my ringtone. I got the "Wow you're a fag" look from the guys at work that cmdrfly spoke of.

That's all for now.
 
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pakomen said:
If you're referring to me, I have no excuse. Can I plead insanity? Or something?
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You may not! I never listened to music while xping bst. Perhaps I should have because my bst experience was more like the sound track to the movie "Eight Million Ways to Die"

More embarrasment: I accidentally MPKed a Japense party in altepa. I had just gotten release, and I released a dhalmel too close to where they were fighting a dhalmel. The two dhalmels linked and wiped their party. I tried really hard to tell them I was sorry, but they kept motioning angrily at me even months later.
 
I keep reading these posts about people shitting on the floor, shitting on their hand, etc. I'm just wondering... what the hell kinda fucked up... mind... i mean... just... wtf?

/brainpop

wtf makes you say to yourself "I'll just shit in my hand and walk it to the toilet".

Seriously.
 
Time for the biggest story i have.

When i was about 7 i was playing kickball in my backyard with my brothers and some of my older brothers friends. My big bro kicked the ball into our neighbors yard. Me being the helpful person i am went to get it. On my way back over the fence.....something of mine got caught on the sharp metal fence.

I get off the fence laughing at first. I look at my bros and their friends to see their eyes wide open like i was dead. I look down and there was blood going down my leg. I dropped my pants then and there in front of my brothers and their friends. I had cut my ball sack on the SHARP metal fence. Blood was coming out of that like a fountain. My older bro fainted and split his head open on the sidewalk. I don't remember anything after that. I blacked out i think.....

How's that for embarrassing?
 
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