Mixi said:
Yeah, I took it as you were saying 'when in a JP game, do as the JP do', when indeed we are all players in the same game.
It's more along the lines of "if you're in a party with five Japanese players, try to do as a Japanese player would." A lot of Americans get stubborn and defensive about "their" way of doing things, but in that situation, it really does make more sense for you to adjust to them than it does for the five of them to adjust to you.
On a more general note, I have some basic Japanese language comprehension, and as of the IME release, I've been able to bust out of the prison of romaji and type in full kana. Being able to get across that I can communicate (even minimally) in Japanese in my comments has increased my party invitations from Japanese players, and I was beginning to think I was catching on to some of their habits that differ from NA players.
I can wholeheartedly agree about how leaving a party within an hour or two of joining it is far more frowned upon within the Japanese player base. In their eyes, if you don't have the time to stay with the party as long as it's going to last (at least three or four hours in a decent one), you shouldn't have joined in the first place. I'm inclined to agree with them on this point: NA players are faaaarrr to willing to leave a party in the dust once they get ther own level, and no...find a replacement after you've fought for 45 minutes does NOT make everything alright.
What makes things worse is that I'd estimate about 6 or 7 times out of ten, people don't really HAVE to leave. Oh, they may or may not give you a good reason, and they may or may not be lying, but much of the time, I really suspect that they've just gotten bored of the party and want out.
One other thing I began to notice, too, is that Japanese players tend to be more upfront about their party information when asking another player if they'd be interested. This is something I feel is kind of unique to FFXI; that is, NA players tend to make the sum total of their invitation {Party}{Do you need it?}.
That's hardly better than a blind invite, if it's better at all. Most of the invitations I receive are indeed like that, and having come from a background in Everquest, I always frustratedly at least do a /search all on the person that asked, so I can (at minimum) get a bead on their current level and job, and whether or not they're asking me as a replacement. A little courtesy information will go a long way into making someone feel comfortable about joining your party. Of course, NA players tend to be more willing to dive into a party blind, so it may simply never occur to a lot of us.
A few beneficial habits that I wish more NA players would adopt:
1) If you only have an hour or two to play, you shouldn't look for a party. I'm sorry, but that's the way I feel.
"But I don't have more than two hours a night to play!
"
Then a slow-progression MMORPG like this may not be the best choice for you. Consider levelling a solo job. Do not, however, force a party to deal with your after-one-hour disband.
2) While I do appreciate the sentiment in your desire to find a replacement, realize that the fact that you did it doesn't necessarily make you better than a player who simply gives advanced notice of their planned departure. In fact, in some situations, I'd say it's almost worse than if you had just plain left. It is almost NEVER a good idea to just start looking for someone else out of the blue ... if the first notification to your party that you're leaving is the arrival of your replacement, there's a good chance that you didn't do anyone any favors.
Why? A number of reasons:
If you want out because the party sucks, it's not kosher to try to find a replacement. You're just shirking your burden and bad luck on some other poor, unsuspecting soul. Have the balls to say you don't think the party is working, suggest what would need to happen to improve things, and if you don't think any improvement will happen at all, explain to your group that you're not willing to play any longer, and why. At least the direct approach has the merit of honesty. If you're really concerned with doing the right thing, it should not involve making another person suffer where you weren't willing to.
More importantly, there is something that simply doesn't seem to occur to many people: you should ask the PARTY before you try to find a replacement; you shouldn't just do so in silence. In my opinion, if you don't at least make a cursory effort to consult with the party first, it's hardly any better than saying "haf 2 g0 after my lvl l0l."
Consider the situation you're getting this other person into: is the party going to disband in twenty minutes? Maybe the group just wants to take your leaving as an opportunity to quit. TALK TO THE PARTY ABOUT IT FIRST,
PLEEEAAASE.
I actually had someone in a party yesterday tell me they've never heard anyone ask their party if it would be a good idea to find a replacement for them before doing so, after trying to invite a monk before bothering to find out that the group was likely to disband in half an hour. He argued with me for almost ten minutes about it. It's possible he's never seen someone bother, but I've seen lots: in my opinion, the truly considerate players do. He did not, however, disagree on the point that doing so would be a good idea.
3)True "Internet outages" are rare, for almost everyone. I'm not talking about your standard disconnects; I'm talking about the ol' lagging out and never returning. It certainly doesn't happen often enough to explain the frequency with which folks mysteriously disappear. Understand that you're not fooling anyone with your intentional disconnect: there will be, at the very least, a strong suspicion that you did it on purpose. The practice is too widespread, and the possibility of your Internet really being "out" so unlikely, that the suspicion is guaranteed.
I'm not saying that it never happens legitimately; don't post your "story" of it happening to you. We all know it does. I'm saying that I'd estimate that at least half of them are fake. Once again, just be direct if you want to leave. There's less to be guilty about in that (in my opinion) than in unplugging your modem.
4) If you're the leader, that means more than finding all the necessary members for the party. Please take the initiative to also decide where the party is headed, what they're fighting, and setting up all the necessary skillchain, SATA, and other necessary details. Don't force the red mage to beg the black mage to stop casting Bio II. Don't make your thief tell the dark knight not to get in the way of his trick attack. Keep things in line; with one person clearly running things, even if you don't have the most skill in the world, party efficiency should skyrocket. This doesn't mean you don't have to listen to suggestions and advice from your party members, nor does it necessarily mean that you can't run your party as a democracy. It does mean, however, that the initiative for all decisions, the person who should get the ball rolling on at least a DISCUSSION about things, the person who should finally decide on something when nobody else will ... is YOU.
You're the leader. We're NA players, yes, and culturally, we get a lot more defensive when we're given suggestions (or even instructions) than are Japanese players, but this is one thing we could really do with a bit of humility on.
Little frustrates me more than a leader that does the initial work of forming a party, then goes silent for the next three hours, forcing the people they've invited to organize everything else. Forming a party means strategizing; you're expected to be the brains of the operation. Getting six names in the bottom right corner is NOT the sum of your duties.
5) Okay, so this isn't exactly a party thing, but it's still something we could learn from. Most Japanese players that advertise for something in /shout precede their advertisement each and every time with "shauto shitsureishimasu," (シャウト失礼します) or end it with "shauto shitsureishimashita" (ｼｬｳﾄ失礼しました）. Roughly translated, this means "I'm committing a rudness by shouting, but..."
It's a refreshing change of pace from the people in Lower Jeuno that literally have full-fledged battles of ego in that, flaring pinkish text. -_-
A few things I wish Japanese players would change:
1) I think that many of them carry grudges for far too long, and has been stated already, they have long memories. There should be more allowance for the evolution of a player; a lot can change between what a true newbie is like his first time in Garlaige Citadel, and what the merit party he's forming is like six months later. Most people, I think, can agree that the "one chance" standard is excessively strict ... although the degree of your newbishbess might mean your second chance will be a long time coming.
2) All Japanese citizens that have graduated grade school can read romaji. Not some of them; all. There's a mandatory six years of English in public school set forth by the Japanese Ministry of Education, and the very first thing that Japanese children learn to do with the Roman alphabet is write their own language in it.
Many Japanese players will see romaji, and not bother trying to read it at all. I know this firsthand, and it's frustrating as all get-out. I don't know whether it's because they see the roman letters, and assume it's English, or because they don't want to deign to acknowledging the pollution of their language, or perhaps even because it's just too hard to read.
I'm all but certain, however, that a few Japanese players outright ignore romaji when typed, even when they recognize it as romaji, simply because it was an NA player that typed it.
This is a problem I've been able to avoid since it's been possible to type in kana, but I still wish that some Japanese players would acknowledge the extra mile some players go with at least a minimal response. This is by no means a widespread problem, but when it happens, it's offensive.
Phew, I could go on, but I've got to go to the bathroom, and I've said a lot already.
What does everyone else think?
). 
