Some People Are Dumb

Status
Not open for further replies.
pakomen said:
Definitely the woman... I'm not a fan of man-sweat. Or penises that aren't my own.
Click to expand...

I guarantee you'd find more sweat under one of the woman's knee rolls than you would on Brad's entire body. Nope, that liquid dangling deliciously from his toned pecs is seawater. :spiteful:

Well, I don't mean to gross you out too much, so I'll put a stop to that kind of enticement. Still ... are you honestly implying that you'd place yourself under that woman, to deal with the squishy, slimy moistness of whatever mold is growing under the regions she's long lost track of, rather than deal with the simple (and quickly over) mechanics of one-time exploratory boy-on-boyness?

If you're ever in a situation where you'll have to hop the fence, even for a split-second, it's going to be a lot easier for you to go with the best specimen possible. This really boils down to the age-old issue of some men being unable to come clean about their ability to recognize attractiveness in another man. It's the Seinfeld "Oh, I wouldn't know" schtick.


In the quiet of your mind, where not even your own ego can see you, I don't think so.


Come on. It would be a matter of a shaved, clean orifice in a muscled frame; no phallus-contact necessary. I'm not even sure, on the other hand, if you could FIND a place to penetrate on that poor woman. You'd have to be very careful to avoid hurting her ... the slightest motion could tear her super-thin skin, her organs would be swollen and under constant threat of hemorrhage, and the simple act of rolling over could get her heart racing to dangerous levels. I feel sorry for her, and I certainly don't bear her any malice. We've got to come clean with the fact, however, that it would be very difficult to find a WORSE candidate for sexual contact.


On the other hand, we're talking about Brad Pitt -- the only real negative qualifer of which is that he's the "wrong" gender. What we're measuring, here, is how realistic a deal-breaker that is in the minds of most people. What I (and Sneaky, and many others) are betting on is that this attitude of "unbreakable heterosexuality" is an act in most people ... when driven to far enough of an extreme, it crumbles. I'll grant that this case might not be extreme ENOUGH for some people (but I'd certainly say it probably is for the vast majority of us), but there definitely comes a point for EVERYONE.


The inability for some people to come clean about this is little different from the mentality that prevented so many of us in adolescence from admitting that we masturbate ... we were terrified of the jeering in our circle of pubescent, moronic friends. Even when all of our friends did exactly the same (which we were unsure of in the first place), it wouldn't have stopped them from getting in on the public humiliation. This was more of a problem decades ago, in my father's generation, but it's an excellent example.

In the end, we all realize that even the Pope probably creeps off to the bathroom to squeeze one out on a regular basis, and we stop with the ultra-paranoid facade.


This "OMG id radder fug a gurl donkee than a d00d" attitude, however, is something a few men take to their graves.


The difference, I suppose, is that the "do you jack off" question starts popping up around age 12-14, while the "who'd you rather" question begins to surface around the age a lot of guys are joining fraternities and getting their first serious jobs. We have time to mature and grow out of the first paranoia of being "found out," but we tend to get locked into the second round of paranoia as we enter adulthood. Many of us even start to believe it.



To reiterate what Sneaky has already said ... I'd definitely rather be with Angelina than Brad. We're not arguing this. We understand you're straight, nobody suspects that you might be gay or bisexual, and this isn't some sort of "test."

If we replaced, however, Angelina with "the lady in that pink tutu" ... I'm not going to stick to my guns. What's more, I'm willing to bet that no matter what you say, as long as you could be sure nobody would ever find out ... neither would you.



Well, I'll take my choice into a secluded corner, you take yours, and we'll see who has more nightmares afterwards. Both of us might have a few, but I'm sure the winner for the most wouldn't be me.
 
Last edited:
You put up a good arguement, but, no, I'd still go with the woman... I'm not going to put my penis in a butthole lol.
 
No shame in porkin', none at all... /puke
 
Well if you go with Brad you might be able to get him to convince Angelina to join in. As awkward as it might be, I'd go with double penetration over buttsecks or whale secks.
 
"Don't look at me like that, fat chicks need love too! ...But they gotta pay."

I'd go with brad myself, it's either a big payoff from the tabloids or a nice chunk of blackmail change. I'd rather get a large chunk of change from having sex with someone I'm not remotely attracted to instead of having sex with someone else I'm not attracted to for free.
 
Brad for me please. Angelina can join too. /drools

I mean, I love penis, always will, but some girls...some are just way too hot not to do.

ALL RIGHT! I'M OPENING MYSELF TO NEW EXPERIENCES, YAY!
 
She's really not all that good looking. Well, I mean, she has a great body but if she weren't a celebrity, I don't imagine anyone would go gay for her.
 
Probably not Natalie, definitely Jessica. Oh dude, you know who? That chick from The Notebook and Kate Beckinsale. I'd munch rug for them if I were female.
 
fat_and_ugle.jpg


mmmm...oh yeah baby shake dat ass

FatWomenTryingtogetpantson.jpg


Oh zip that zipper up baby....you know you want it!

up-men-00004.jpg


Now everyone rate me up for posting sexy people on here! ;p

Oh snap, after I bang those other two chicks I'll have this guy gimme a BJ! :D


I have no real point in this thread. I guess what I'm trying to say is some people are gay, and can do straight things, some people are straight, but could do gay things, and then other people are just not willing to do anything with the same sex.

Jesus tells us that homosexuals will go to heaven. How about this?! If Jesus came to you and said "You must have sex with this incredibly ugly person or you will not get into heaven...and you must enjoy it." What would you do!?

edit - Kage, this is your cue for the furry pronz. Let the gay smut begin.
 
Last edited:
Miros said:
Jesus tells us that homosexuals will go to heaven. How about this?! If Jesus came to you and said "You must have sex with this incredibly ugly person or you will not get into heaven...and you must enjoy it." What would you do!?
Click to expand...
I would tell Jesus to fuck off.

Miros said:
I guess what I'm trying to say is some people are gay, and can do straight things, some people are straight, but could do gay things...
Click to expand...

I believe the term for both cases is actually bisexual...?
 
Last edited:
I'm straight, but I'll tell you that if Brad Pitt walked up to me and asked if I wanted to have sex with him, I probably wouldn't say no. Hell, how many people can say they had sex with someone that famous?
 
pakomen said:
I believe the term for both cases is actually bisexual...?
Click to expand...

Eh, that's a difficult call. If I were given a choice of
fat%20guy.jpg


And

stephanie-mcmahon-002.jpg


I will be honest, I'd rather close my eyes and romance explosion on the female. =p And I'm not bi.

just.JPG


*smacks lips* Now Justin is more my type out of any of these pictures. ;p
 
Miros said:
fat_and_ugle.jpg
Click to expand...

Ok lol I went to the breast cancer walk yesterday and I seriously did see a woman like this. (she didnt have breast cancer) The woman wasn't fat, her upper body was like midweight, but DAMN HER ASS WAS FUCKING HUGE LIKE THAT PIC!!!

Except the legs were kinda chubby..those legs on that pic wouldn't be able to hold up their body xDD

"Why can't you walk?"
"MY ASS IS TOO BIG"
 
Do the old saying "Shitting pancakes" come from those two women?
 
Status
Not open for further replies.
Back
Top